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Loronz neva loos ya see. If ya win ya win, if ya die ya die fightin so it dont count. If ya run away den ya can jus come back ta fight anuva day an dats alrite. If a god coems an takes ya to anubva dimension den dey jus cheated an cheaateas are dumb. In dis way, aLoron neva loses. No matta wat empire.

- Zr'Ahgloth

About the only thing the Loron are good at. They steal from other races technology so their technology is the most advanced ever and they kidnap scientists, often then end up torturing them and eating their brains to gain their knowledge.

- Galot

Loron thrive on conflict, and the Unified Nation of Ottzello's Loron Warz is no exception.. The strongest rise to the top while the weakest die and become forgotten. Loron charge across battle trying to tear everything in their path to prove that "da boyz is da best". For strategies, the Loron are often led by Inalton, Kralgon or Grimbolsaurian. that dictate good tactics. This is a reason stronger Loron rarely lose wars (if you can retreats as not losing). They use weaponry from the rest of the Unified Nation, which is more potent their than previous crude weaponry.

Before the battle, music by Flo'Sikka, mostly by his album Da Sikkest Eva 1 and 2, is played, to get the Loron in the mood to smash things and tear everything apart. This is because of its call and response shouting, lyrical content about 'smashin stoof up', and catchy beats.

Characteristics[]

Role[]

The reason Loron are used as UNO's man military are:

  1. Intimidation - The size, the numbers, the strength and the noise of the Loron forces is enough to make any foe feel largely intimidated by Loron invasion
  2. Strength - Physically, the Loron are strong enough to take down an epic creature, making them tough enough to survive one too. With their speed an agility also, they are even stronger.
  3. Filled in gaps - On their own, the Loron were disorganized, barbaric and too stupid to know weak points. However, UNO is full of species, such as Inalton, who are capable of leading the Loron to the right spots. Furthermore, UNO has The System.
  4. Supplementation - With the Tralkikianoe, soldiers from other races, and the Kralgon AI Weapons, the Loron are even greater soldiers.
  5. Cloning - Loron had massive numbers to begin with, thanks to Da Chikz, but perfected cloning technology makes the Loron even more numerous.

Methods[]

Loron do not fight with honour. They don't see fighting as a battle, or a struggle, but as a sport. They see something and concentrate on it until it's dead. But they often try and eat it during the battle, a shame, since they can die in the process. You can't really say they fight with courage, because they're too thick to know how they die. Their extreme toughness means that when they get to the enemy to fight in close combat (Which is their most common and best way of fighting), they often reach before they die, and their numbers are immense. They can fight mid-range, but none of their technology is capable of fight long range, so they have to scavenge it. They always eat and scavenge after the battle. They barely ever lose battles that they try and win. Only 2 occaisions has this ever been known, since the writer accidently made a mistake and wrote it twice by accident.

Gangs[]

Main article: Da Gangz

Loron usually fight in "gangs", which serve as the equivalent of a squad for Loron (when in fact it is much larger). Since most Loron Gangz all wish to be the same trooper class of Loron, they essentially behave just as a squad would, with the squad leader being the Gangboss. Gangs choose which Warboss they want to work for, just as Warbosses choose which Big Warboss they want to work for. If there are no spaces or one Warboss is leading no gangz, then the Propa Big Warboss puts them in a Warboss gang.

Da Charge[]

The Loron charge, as documented by Grimbolsaurian armies, is the beginning to Loron battles. It is the first 10 or so seconds in which the Loron charge up to the opposing army with their chainsaws, teeth, fists and guns. They charge as if sprinting, very excited about the bloodshed. Several Loron die get trampled in the chaos, while others die from enemy ranged weapons before they reach their foe, which is described by loron as the saddest and geekiest way to die ever.

During the fight, several Loron "Trukkas"- vehicles carrying Loron Boyz- drive to the enemy and unleash Loron, who simply jump out, guns blazing and smash up the enemy. Trukkas take pride in going fast, and thus often run over enemies (on purpose) or crash into enemy vehicles (which is described as the best way to die ever). Either way, the Gang in the vehicle will jump out, as they can be pushed so that trukka's roof comes off.

Besides huge amount of Boyz and Trukkas, all that enemies see are missiles and cannons reaching and failing to reach their target.

Army[]

To browse all pages, scroll to the bottom of the page

A Loron army is called "Warboyz", or "Armyboyz". An example of how they are named is, if Propa Big Warboss Tlat'Dako is the leader, the army is named Warboyz Tlat'Dako.

Ranking System[]

Da Loron Rankingz
type Normal Big Propa Big Boss
Da Boyz Troopa Big Troopa Propa Big Troopa War Boss
Da Boom Boyz Booma Big Booma Propa Big Booma Boom Boss
Da Warboss Da War Boss Da Big War Boss Da Propa Big War Boss Da Boss

List[]

Troopas
Main article: Troopas

Troopas are the core of Loron armies. Loron armies thrive on huge amounts of Boyz to overrun the enemies in terms of number. Loron Boyz are really effective in close combat, which is one of the greatest strengths of Loron military's.

Da Boom Boyz
Main article: Boomerz

Boomerz are a supplement to the military. They cause huge explosions and detonations, and deal with large threats, usually vehicles.

Da Warboss
Main article: Warbosses

War Bosses are the most common type of Loron boss, and are leaders in a gang.

Da Loron stoof
WEZ DA REAL LORONZ MAN DONT REED DAT UNO STOOF ITS DUM
OI BOLD MEENS SPESHUL STOOF
WE IS DA REAL COOL LORONZ DA ROGUE BOYZ IS DUM DONT REED DEM
WE IZ DA DEFFMARCH BOYZ AN WE IS DA BEST COS WE WIV DA MALI'NAR YA DUMBOS
Part SporeWiki:Fiction Universe
Now reformed as the Union Republic of Ottzello
Bold indicates major members, Italics indicates UNO's version of other races
Note that aside from 'Main military lineup', most pages are on things which are unused
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