SporeWiki
Register
Advertisement
Dancewithdevil Icon Da Insurrekshon is a Historical Event
"Da Insurrekshon" is considered a historical event or a completed fiction within the SporeWiki Fiction Universe. You must ask its original creator if you wish to add any additional stories.

ITS CLEER DAT DA LEEDASHIP OF DA ROGUE BOYZ IS NO LONGA FIT TA RULE. DEYZ OUT OF TOUCH WIV DEIR PEEPZ AN DEY HAV LOST DEIR WAY. ITS TIME TA TAKE OVA!!!!

- Def'glasha

With Da Rogue Boyz domesticated following the failure of Da Reckoning, the first war that the Loron had ever admitted to losing, many of the citizens of Da Rogue Boyz had grown increasingly impatient with their leaders. The leaders had lost the respect of much of their people, having become apparently neglectful in the years of inactivity.

One Loron would lead a coup, which he dubbed Da Insurrekshon, against them. His goal was simple: slowly take planets from the Rogue Boyz leaders and convert them to his cause, until they fought him on his own turf, at which point he would kill them. Their only way to win was by planning a heist to rob his fortress and take him by surprise.

The battle that ensued would be a battle for the soul of Da Rogue Boyz.

The Challenger Arrives[]

A few months had gone by since the last exciting event in the lives of Da Rogue Boyz, in which Brag'klogga, the Loron Shaman Boss, had managed to "revive" their greatest god as Zr'An and K'ar, two separate deities that ruled all over them. Usually, what would follow would be a directive from their god spurring them into action of some kind, which a few of the Big Warbosses had eagerly awaited, but most still wished to put off for a while.

Ever since Da Reckoning, a defeat so bad that it became the first war that the Rogue Boyz ever admitted to losing, the Loron had remained entirely domesticated and in various states of boredom. Some of the Big Warbosses and Leedas spent their time sleeping, playing videogames, or otherwise doing nothing of action, while a few, such as Drizz'pyrokirk, had picked up an entirely new hobby in the absence of war. Following Da Reckoning, the trial by the Polar Crystal Alliance was clear: any act of aggression, however minor, would result in a mass extinction event the likes of which the galaxy had never seen. Since then, the domesticated Loron had gained a serious amount of weight.

But by now, the Propa Big Rogue King, Grak'tona, leader of the Cold Loron who believed himself the rightful leader of the entire Rogue Boyz, had himself grown extremely tired of the inaction on the part of the Loron. Though he had been content with waiting for Fre'kloar, the Propa Big Rogue Boss, to make the call, Grak'tona took it upon himself to make a statement that he felt would end the inaction of the Loron:

  • Grak'tona - OK PEEPS. AS MA LOYAL BODYGUARDS I DEMAND DAT WE GET OFF OUR ASSES AN STOP BEIN LAZI

All the other Loron looked at him with unimpressed expressions. Hagto'Zhl, the Dark Loron boss, slouched on his chair and scratched his belly as he replied.

  • Hagto'Zhl - ok serius question. hao long is dis "bodyguard" fing gonna go on? its gettin reel tiresome by nao
  • Grak'tona - TA BE A BODYGUARD TO DA RITEFUL KING OF ALL LORON IS AN HONOR DAT FEW CAN EVA ACHEEV. SO ID SHUT UP AN PAY RESPECT
  • Hagto'Zhl - man id be reel peeved an say im sik of puttin up wiv yoo but tbh im too lazi ta care at dis point hur
  • Fre'kloar - YEH GRAK HAO BOUT YA SAY WAT EXACTLY SHULD WE DO DEN??? IF YOR SO SMART
  • Grak'tona - IM GLAD YOO ASKED BRUH. BECUZ I, YOR ROYAL KING, SLAYA OF DA AMBOMINABUL SNOW LORON AN RITEFUL HEIR TO DA THRONE OF GRAK'LUSIS, or was dat his name? i forgot ma dads name, ANYWAY I HAV DA SOLUTION

Grak'tona then stood up on a table in front of him, only for his crown to fall off. He scrambled to pick it back up, coughed a little under his breath, and pointed at Brag'klogga, who was on a corner of the room, scratching his back like some sort of ape.

  • Grak'tona - I CALL UPON YOO, BRAG'KLOGGA, DA CHOSEN SHAMAN BODYGUARD, TA ASK ZR'AN AN K'AR WAT WES GONNA DO
  • Brag'klogga - WAH???? ... oh ok sur

Brag'klogga proceeded to get properly on his feet and channel his Essence, and his voice begun to echo as he let out an incantation. Suddenly, all the Loron around him could hear the loud and awesome voices of Zr'An and K'ar in their heads.

  • Zr'An - WAT DA HELL DO YA WANT NAO
  • K'ar - CANT A GOD HAV SOM PEECE AN QUIET IN DA WEEKEND I SWER
  • Grak'tona - O GOD OF WAR, BEST GOD EVA, I DA KING HUMBLY REQUEST DAT YOO GIV US LOWLY LORONZ SOMFIN TA DO BEFOR DEY ALL DIE IN DEIR SLEEP OR SOMFIN
  • K'ar - YOR DA KING? WELL I DIDNT VOTE FER YA
  • Zr'An - MAN WHAI IS YA BOTHERIN US BOUT DIS JUS GO STAB SOM IDIOTS OR WATEVA
  • Jol'kiar - UGH JUS IGNOR GRAK HES A MORON. OK LOOK HEERS DA FING. SINCE DA RECKONIN WEVE HAD NUFFIN TA DO BECUZ IF WE KILL PEEPZ DEN DEY JUS GANG UP ON US AN WIPE US OUT AN BAK IN MY DAYZ WE DIDNT RUSH TA SUICIDAL MISHONS. SO BASICALLY YEH PLZ GIV US SOMFIN TA DO TA END OUR BOREDOM STREEK OR ELSE IDK WATS GONNA HAPPEN BUT DIS CANT KEEP GOIN ON
  • Grak'tona - IF YOO SPEEK ABOUT DA KING LIKE DAT AGEN IMMA HAV YOO EXECUTED
  • Jol'kiar - YOO ORDERED ME EXECUTED FIFTY TIMEZ NOW AN NUFFIN HAPPENED SO SHUT UP

The voices of the Loron Godz roared across their heads, forcing them to be quiet.

  • Zr'An - ENUFF. YOO LOT IS HOPELESS
  • K'ar - YEH WATS WIV YA IDIOTS ASKIN US WAT TA DO CANT YA WORK OUT BY YASELVES? WES NOT YA BABYSITTAS YA PANSIES
  • Zr'An - YEH HEER ME NAO AN BELEEV ME LATA. YOO LOT MUST FIND DA TRU LORONLY FINGS TA DO AN NOT WAIT FER US TA TELL YA WAT TA DO CUS DATS LAZI AN WE HATE LAZINESS
  • Kal'kuir - ...ya meen... playin WORLD OF GANGSTACRAFT ISNT LORONLY????
  • K'ar - DATS A GEEKY GAME FER GEEKS
  • Kal'kuir - WATS WRONG WIV GEEKS?????
  • Jol'kiar - well a lot tbh
  • Kal'kuir - ok point taken but yeh BY MY CALCULASHONS DA ONLY LORONLY FINGS LEFT TA DO AR TA GO JOIN DRIZZ'PYROKIRKS GYM AN LITERALLY NO ONE WANTS TA DO DAT
  • Zr'An - WELL DATS A GUD START TBH. GET PUMPED UP. GO MOB SOM GRANDPA OFF HIS WALLET IDUNNO. BE GANGSTA
  • K'ar - YEH WHERS DA WARZ AT? GO DO WAR STOOF. DONT CARE IF YA GET KILLED DATS HAO LIFE GOES
  • Ray'loth - ive been tellin dem fer YEERS ta do war stoof BUT DEY DONT LISSEN TA ME. DEYZ ALL "OHHH BUT DEN DA POLITICALLY CORRECT ASSKISSAS WILL BOM US AGEN" IM LIKE WE GOTTA MAKE OUR STAND SOMEHOW
  • K'ar - YEH. GO FIND A WAY TA MAKE A STAND. AN DONT ASK US TA DO IT FER YA
  • Zr'An - YEH. cus tbh we dont reely got a clue ourselves PLUS DATS LOWLY MORTAL WORK NOT FIT FER DA GODZ
  • Brag'klogga - ENUFF OF DIS. ZRAN AN KAR NEED TA GO BAK TO DA GODLY SAUNA TA HAV A BAFF AN WEVE DISTURBED DEM TOO LONG. OK YOO CAN GO SORRY FER DA TRUBL
  • Zr'An - YEH YA SHULD BE SORRY YA WIMPS
  • K'ar - YA HERD DAT RITE. WIIIIIIIIMPS!!!!!

With that, the god duo's presence vanished from their heads. Looking furious, Grak'tona stormed towards Brag'klogga and lifted him by his throat.

  • Grak'tona - YOO ANGERED DA GODZ. IMMA HAV YOR HED CUT OFF
  • Brag'klogga - HAO DARE YA. YOR DA ONE WHO DISTURBED DA GODZ
  • Grak'tona - YA MOM!!!!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - man jus shut up an leev brag alone dis is goin nowhere

Before Grak'tona could lay a finger on Brag'klogga, he was immediately zapped with electricity and knocked him out cold. The others turned to see where it came from, only to see Da Propa Big Rogue Geek's metal avatar form along with Rel'larutina, the Norol leader, who had apparently decided among themselves how to handle the situation before they intervened. Rel'larutina sighed and addressed the room.

  • Rel'larutina - You know, I'd never thought I'd be the one to give us orders to instigate a war or anything, but it looks like you people haven't exactly left me a choice so I guess you'll just have to put up with the fact you're taking orders from me. We've got a serious situation.
  • Fre'kloar - wat. SINCE WHEN?????
  • Rel'larutina - Since... When was the exact date, Rogue Geek?
  • Rogue Geek - Fifteen years ago, three months, and twenty-five days.
  • Rel'larutina - Yeah, then. Have none of you been monitoring our star maps?
  • Hagto'Zhl - man do i look like i kno wat dat is
  • Voa'reak - hol up. if wes been led by chikz fer 15 yeers... does dat meen wes nao "da rogue gals"?
  • Rel'larutina - Trust me, if we were "Da Rogue Gals", this place would be ten times cleaner, fifty times better decorated, one hundred times more efficient, oh and Zalk'don would've taken a bath sometime this year.
  • Zalk'don - SOAP RUINS DA BOMZ
  • Rel'larutina - Yeah, point taken. Well, either way, there were 22,000 colonies under Rogue Boyz control fifteen years ago. There are now 18,000. Seem like a problem to you? I mean, other than the ones Kal'kuir keeps blowing up in his experiments, anyway.
  • Fre'kloar - yoooo slow down dere. YA MEEN DERES SOMEON KILLIN US??? HAO DID WE NOT NOTICE????
  • Rogue Geek - Not quite. In fact, these worlds were not killed by a foreign threat of any kind. Otherwise I'd have actually bothered to sound the alarm that Kal'kuir programmed. What he never took into account was these worlds simply rebelling against us.
  • Rel'larutina - And I'd hoped that at some point within the past 15 years you'd actually get a handle on this, but noooooooo. Too busy getting up your high score in whatever that game it is you're playing. These worlds rebelled.

Jol'kiar, who was drinking a bottle of soda, immediately spit it all out on Fre'kloar.

  • Jol'kiar - REBELLED?!?!?!?!
  • Voa'reak - man dis is like da old rebellion?? but bakwards???
  • Rel'larutina - Sort of. But the reason I finally decided to speak up about it is because you've received a transmission call from them.
  • Rogue Geek - Specifically, the one you kept declining to answer because you assumed it was the pizza delivery girl.
  • Hagto'Zhl - dis is perhaps worse dan a copycat dumbo. dis is... a TRAITA DUMBO!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - PUT DIS LOSA ON DA LINE I WANNA SEE HIS UGLY MUG
  • Rel'larutina - Gladly.

The Rogue Geek darkened the room as she displayed a large hologram in the center of the room. Oddly enough, the hologram at first didn't seem to show anything other than the vague silhouette of a large Loron with extremely beefy armor, sat on a chair with spikes all across it aside from the arm rests. At first they assumed the signal was bad, but they realized instead that their vision was being blurred specifically. They heard soft laughter as the voice spoke.

  • ??? - GREETINS MORONS. GLAD YOO FINALLY ACCEPTED DA CHALLENG
  • Fre'kloar - MAN WHO DA HELL IS YOO I HEER YOR STEELIN MA PLANETS DATS DUM
  • ??? - YOR PLANETS??? DATS WHER YOR WRONG LOSA. DA PLANETS DONT BELONG TO DA BOSSES, DEY BELONG TO DA LORONZ. SO GET OUTTA HEER WIV YOR ELITISM. DIS IS WHY I LAUNCHED DA CHALLENG IN DA FIRST PLACE
  • Jol'kiar - BAK IN MA DAY DA BOYZ RESPECTED DEIR BOSSES. WHO DO YA FINK YOO IS TA SPEEK TA US LIKE DIS?
  • ??? - UNDA MA NEW EMPIYA WE EINT GONNA DO DAT NO MOAR. WE DONT RESPECT DA BOSSES UNTIL DEY EARN OUR RESPECT. AN MAYBE YOO LOT HAV BEEN STUK IN YA DUM SPACE SHIP FER LIKE FIFTY DOZEN YEERS SINCE YOO LED US INTO A POINTLESS RECKONIN WAR BUT DA PEEPZ OUT HEER DONT CARE FER YAS NO MOAR. ITS TIME FER A CHANGE OF LEEDASHIP
  • Fre'kloar - UNACCEPTABUL. I FOUNDED DA ROGUE BOYZ THRU HARD WORK AN BY KILLIN DA DEVIL HIMSELF. I AM DA BEST BOSS EVA HAO DARE YOO NOT RESPECT ME
  • ??? - WELL YOR IN LUK DAT DERES A FEW PLANETS OUT DERE DAT STILL RESPEKT YAS BUT EVENTUALLY DEYZ GONNA BOW TA ME
  • Fre'kloar - OK DATS IT DUMBO. TELL ME WHERE YOR AT SO I CAN SLAP YA

The silhouette of the Loron appeared to chuckle and rub his hands together, until he stood up. As he stood, the throne behind him disappeared, descending into the ground, as he walked closer towards the camera, spat, and then stepped back a bit, pacing from left to right as he delivered his speech.

  • ??? - FER OVA A DOZEN DOZEN YEERS WE HAV WATCHED FRUM DA VILLAGES AS YOR EMPIYA REIGNED OVA US. WE HAV WATCHED IN DISGUST AS OUR TEKK HAS BEEN PLACED IN DA HANDS OF A CRAZY WHAKO DAT KNOS NUFFIN. AS OUR HOLY BOOKS HAV BEEN WRITTEN BY AN UTTA MORON WHO PROB CANT EVEN NAME HIS OWN MOM. AS OUR TROOPS HAV BEEN LED BY A HORNY FREEK DAT ATE HIS GIRLFREND. AS OUR PEEPZ HAV BEEN MARCHED OFF TA BATTLE BY AN IDIOT DAT FINKS DAT FLYIN IS MOAR IMPORTANT DAN FITIN, WHIL DROPPIN BOMZ MADE FRUM A PYROMANIAC DAT DOESNT CARE WEN HIS OWN BOYZ GET BLOWN UP BY HIS BOMZ. AN AS SOM THIKKO IN A TANK CLAIMS DAT DA ONLY FING IMPORTANT EINT ABOUT DA THRILL OF KILLIN PEEPZ, EINT ABOUT COMMITTIN DA SIKKEST GANGSTA CRIMES, BUT ABOUT OUTRACIN YA OPPONENTS. AN DIS IS ALL BEIN LED BY A FLIPPIN CHIK.

The marching Loron's voice grew in intensity and passion, as this time he turned towards the camera, no longer marching up and down, but rather screaming at it. Saliva spat from his mouth as he raised his tone in anger.

  • ??? - ITS CLEER DAT DA LEEDAS OF DA ROGUE BOYZ HAV ABANDONED WAT DA LORON IS ALL ABOUT. YOOV ABANDONED ALL OUR VALUES, YOOV ABANDONED ALL YOR PEEPZ WHO TODAY SUFFA IN DA STREETS BECUZ DERES NO LEEDASHIP AN INSTED ITS JUS MOBS FITIN OTHA MOBS OVA WHOS GONNA PLEEZ DEIR WEEK ASS LEEDAS DA MOST. BUT I HAV REALIZED DEIR FATAL ERRA: DERES NO POINT PLEEZIN YOO MORONS. DERES NO POINT WASTIN TIME WORRIED ABOUT WAT FREKLOAR FINKS OR WHO GRAKTONA IS GONNA HAV PUBLICLY EXECUTED. LITERALLY A WASTE OF TIME FRUM LEEDAS DAT HAV LOST TOUCH WIV DEIR OWN PEEPZ AN SPENT DA LAST FEW DOZEN YEERS DOIN NUFFIN. WE IS SIK AN TIRED OF IT.

Stepping in front of the camera one final time, out of the pitch black of his room, the Rogue Boyz could see this Loron more clearly. He was tall even for Loron standards, matching Fre'kloar's height, but wearing thick, heavy armor that covered his entire body except for his eyes. The armor he wore had rusted over time, clearly taken scrapes from battle, while on his chestplate was written a red tally, apparently of all the planets he had taken over, that seemed to number in the hundreds, while the skulls of dead Loron could be seen on his shoulder plates. The Loron grabbed the camera as he delivered his last few lines.

  • ??? - I AM DEF'GLASHA, DA NEW LEEDA OF DA ROGUE BOYZ, AN I WILL LEED US TA A NEW GLORIUS DAY IN WHICH WE FINALLY HAV REVENGE ON DA OONIVERSE AN TAKE IT OVA AN MAKE ALL OTHA PUNY SPECIES OUR SLAVES. PEECE OUT JAKASSES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

With that, Def'glasha closed the transmission, shaking the camera and laughing, before the hologram terminated. The Loron all looked at each other, apprehensive and unsure of what to say at the situation; perhaps deep down, at least a few of them saw some truth in the speech. Knar'gank, who was squatting close to Gol'thabex, shrugged his shoulders.

  • Knar'gank - huh. i escaped da dissin. cool
  • Rel'larutina - Well, that's because you're so silent and quiet all the time that no one notices you. Guess that means you're doing a good job.
  • Hagto'Zhl - man i dont like dis one bit. im angry but im also sad. im sangry

Apparently waking from his sleep, Grak'tona stood up instantly. Initially, the Loron thought they'd had to explain exactly what had just happened, but Grak'tona had been listening to it all.

  • Grak'tona - WELL REGARDLESS OF WAT HE SAID ABOUT US, HES COMMITTIN TREESUN TO DA CROWN. AN I WONT STAND FER IT. WE GOTTA DESTROY HIM
  • Fre'kloar - MAN SCROO YOR CROWN. IM GONNA DESTROY HIM CUS HES COMMITTIN TREESUN TA ME
  • Jol'kiar - IM GONNA DESTROY HIM BECUZ DIS IS LORON TRADISHON. DA CHALLENGA FACES DA LEEDA AN IF DA CHALLENGA WINS DEN DEY TAKE OVA. WE GOTTA PROOV DAT WES STILL IN CHARGE
  • Hagto'Zhl - im gonna destroy him cus im evil lol
  • Rel'larutina - How about this: None of you are going to destroy him. It won't be that easy.
  • Fre'kloar - AND JUS LET DIS CHALLENJ TO OUR RULE GO UN-SMASHED????

Rel'larutina, in place of Def'glasha's hologram, displayed another one. This time, it was showing a bar chart. None of the Loron could see it, but it was actually an opinion poll.

  • Rel'larutina - First thing's first: we don't have the manpower to just take him head on. This is because his troopas are a hell of a lot more enthusiastic than any of ours are, as most of ours are pretty, let's just say, out-of-shape. Secondly, even of those we do have, there's a very good probability that half of them will just surrender there and then because they're really not all that interested in getting involved in Leeda politics, as long as they get pizza on their table. They've got no real loyalty to us. And then that's excluding the larger number of people who've already said that no matter what they won't get involved in the conflict and they'll let it play out.
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - OK I DIDNT WANNA MENSHON ANYFIN BEFOR CUS YOR ALL HOMIES BUT SINCE DIS WAS BROUGHT UP NAO I GOTTA SAY IT: MAN YOO LOT IS FAT!!!!! GET IN SHAPE!!!!!!!!
  • Grak'tona - YEH MA BODYGUARD HEER IS RITE. GET IN SHAPE!!!!!! GO TO DA DRIZZ'PYROKIRK uh i meen DA GRAK'TONA GYM ON DEK 20!!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - SHUT UP DA TWO OF YA. WAT DO WE DO DEN IF WE CANT FITE DIS GEEZA?
  • Rel'larutina - Well, of course, the only real way to win the respect of enough of the Loron to get you to victory is to actually fight Def'glasha and beat him. Of course, that's not easy either. His armor is out-of-this-world, something that I don't think even Kal'kuir could come up with, and everyone who's seen him fight has either died or fled with most of their limbs missing. I don't think any of you in your current shape would beat him head-to-head either. The only one of you who's in vaguely good shape is Drizz'pyrokirk, and I'm sorry, but he simply doesn't have the strength to get through that armor. I don't even think I can take him in my Smasha.
  • Jol'kiar - man i miss da old dayz wher all we had ta worry bout was comin up wiv ways ta shank uno
  • Rel'larutina - So our remaining option is to find a way to reduce the power of his armor and hit him with a surprise attack that he won't see coming.
  • Hagto'Zhl - an den we rip him apart an parade his hed thru all da planets yeh. show dem traita dumbos not ta mess wiv us
  • Rel'larutina - Right. Once we actually kill him, the rest of his support will be reduced significantly. Of course, if we're to do this, we need to take him on the traditional way. One on one. We can't afford to break tradition, or else his followers will see our victory as illegitimate and probably more of our planets will just leave us.
  • Jol'kiar - yeh shes rite. we gotta do it da troo loronly way othawise wes cheets

The Rogue Geek replaced Rel'larutina's hologram with an entirely different one. This time, the Rogue Geek displayed what appeared to be a well-guarded fortress, with a huge citadel in the center, surrounded by turrets, flashlights, and all sorts of security measures that would make it difficult to get in. She then zoomed out to show that the fortress was in fact the size of an entire island.

  • Rel'larutina - Def'glasha is playing the long game here. He won't actually leave his fortress to fight us, he wants us to fight on his turf, where he has the advantage. So that means we're gonna need to break through his fortress.
  • Brag'klogga - man cant i jus teleport us dere
  • Rel'larutina - No. He's got his own Shamans on his side, and they're equally matched with ours. If they saw any sizable amount of Shaman activity, they'd just activate all defenses at once.
  • Brag'klogga - ok jus makin sur befor everyun starts yellin at me fer not doin it earlia
  • Rel'larutina - And whoever's supplying the technology they're using seems to be quite a bit more accomplished than Kal'kuir. So it's important that we start off discreetly.
  • Kal'kuir - MAN DIS EINT FAIR. I MADE DA BEST GUN EVA HAO CAN HE HAV BETTA GUNZ DAN MINE
  • Rel'larutina - That, we don't know. We don't know exactly who's supplying the weapons, but they're good.
  • Fre'kloar - OK YA ALL HERD HER. YOR GONNA BE DISCREET AN YA BEST BE SIK AT IT
  • Knar'gank - lmao ok noob
  • Rel'larutina - Essentially, this is a heist mission. Our goal is simple: disable the defenses, destroy whatever generator powers Def'glasha's armor, cut off any reinforcements, and then stage a fight against him while he's at his weakest.
  • Gol'thabex - hur yall shuld jus leev it ta me. rememba i was da one who did dat sik heist on fat zaarkhun all dem yeers ago
  • Rel'larutina - Yeah, but that was before you gained three hundred pounds of weight.
  • Gol'thabex - shut up man im not DAT fat
  • Knar'gank - uh yoo totally is bro
  • Gol'thabex - ok i mite be A BIT out of shape
  • Rel'larutina - Which is okay, because we have an accomplished, award-winning trainer here to help fix that problem. Our only problem will be just that we're out of practice in battle.
  • Fre'kloar - BUT WHO DO WE PRACTIC ON MAN? WE CANT FITE ANYON WITOUT DA PCA DUMBOS GOIN "ok we kill ya nao"
  • Rel'larutina - We can't. Not of anyone equal to our strength, that is. So, we'll just have to make do and hope the heist works, won't we?

Fre'kloar groaned and sat back down, slumping on his seat.

  • Fre'kloar - DIS SUUUUUUUUUUUUUKS
  • Grak'tona - OI ENUFF LISSENIN TO MA ROYAL CHEF. OK I SAY WE IGNOR EVRYFIN DA GEEK AN DA CHIK SED AN JUS WAIT FER DIS GUY TA ATTAK ANOTHA PLANET DEN AMBUSH HIM AN FITE HIM LIKE LORONZ
  • Hagto'Zhl - i meen we culd. like whai waste time finkin of heists when we can jus eet him when hes not lookin
  • Rel'larutina - Did any of you listen to a word I just said?
  • Knar'gank - i did but im jus an underlin heer so
  • Fre'kloar - OK WE WAIT TIL DIS IDIOT ATTAKS US AN DEN WE JUMP ON HIM AN BEET HIM UP TIL HE CRIES
  • Voa'reak - YEH!!!! IVE NOT FLOWN IN COMBAT FER A LONG TIME AN IM SUPA HYPED FER DIS!!! it was fun birdwatchin tho
  • Kal'kuir - ...SERIUSLY YOO PEEPZ CALL ME A NERD WHIL DIS GEEZA SPENT DA LAST DOZEN YEERS BIRDWATCHIN????
  • Zalk'don - IMMA BOM HIM DEN BOM HIM AGEN JUS TA MAKE SUR
  • Brag'klogga - MAN DIS IS TOTALLY GONNA WORK AN ZR'AN AND K'AR IS GONNA LOV US
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - BOXIN WAS FUN BUT REEL FITIN IS WHER ITS AT
  • Ray'loth - NOBODY DISSES ME OR MA GF. DAT GUYS GOIN DOWN IMMA SHOW HIM WHOS DA BEST ARMY LEEDA EVA
  • Rel'larutina - I... You know what?

Rel'larutina stormed off the table as the Rogue Geek closed the hologram. She turned to them before she was about to leave the room.

  • Rel'larutina - Go and fight your goddamn battle and don't cry when none of you survive and you lose your empire to this Norol-hating jackass.

She then simply left the room, while the Rogue Geek remained there awkwardly.

  • Rogue Geek - Oh, this is odd. I am conflicted. On the one hand, my husband wants to stay and fight. On the other, my best friend wants to let you all die. Let me have a good long think about it. I've thought about it. Bye.

The Rogue Geek then left too, leaving the Loron behind on their own. The Loron all watched akwardly as the two left while, from another room, Traz'raka appeared, drinking from a cup with a straw as he looked around in confusion.

  • Traz'raka - uh did me an lil homie miss da party or wat
  • Grak'tona - i cant be bothered ta fill ya in on da details but BASICALLY WES GONNA FITE A MASSIV BATTLE SOON FER DA FIRST TIME IN AGES AGENST A JAKASS
  • Traz'raka - ok cool havent done mafia stoof in ages. lets do dis man
  • Grak'tona - YEH!!!! FER DA ROGUE BOYZ!!!!! NO ONE TAKES MA CROWN!!!!!!!
  • Hagto'Zhl - i swer one of dese dayz im gonna snap an yor gonna turn into one big blu-colored smeer. BUT IN DA MEENTIME YEH LETS KILL DAT IDIOT


An Embarassing Defeat[]

Infuriated by the mocking tone of Def'glasha, the out-of-shape Rogue Boyz warbosses each entered a different landing shuttle leading a pack of soldiers to land on planet Bog'adfab. The desert planet, once belonging to the Rogue Boyz, was well-known by the Loron as a historic place for bosses to duel due to its scenery. The planet was largely barren aside from a few small cities and rural towns filled with Loron, and around the Shojukdag Canyon, were several skulls from dead Loron whom had fought duels here and died. When duels took place here, they were filmed by one of dozens of floating cameras that filmed the more exciting exchanges. The planet had fallen to Def'glasha's faction as one of the first, so Fre'kloar believed that to attack here and defeat him here, with millions of eyes on the event, would be an excellent way to nip this conflict in the bud.

Though the site was normally home to duels, this time, Fre'kloar brought an entire army with him. But he was about to see that he had become blinded to his own arrogance. Though many of the higher-up Loron surrounding him were enthusiastic and loyal, the infantry and the common boyz were much less so. Many of them were more annoyed than excited to fight here, having little stakes in the conflict themselves other than collecting a paycheck and getting their usual fill of combat. Put simply, in the past few decades, Loron-on-Loron combat had grown completely uninteresting to them by this point. It was just a typical pasttime for them.

Fre'kloar's troopas, and the troopas of the other Leedas and warbosses, landed along the west side of the canyon itself, waiting for Def'glasha's men to arrive on the opposite side. A bridge across the canyon was where duels were normally fought, but the bridge was large enough to have the capacity for two competing armies. As they grouped up in a large mob ready to charge across, Fre'kloar waited several minutes after the cameras had spotted his army for Def'glasha to arrive, and found nothing.

  • Fre'kloar - YO HAS HE GOT COLD FEET? HES NOT ATTAKED US
  • Hagto'Zhl - PROBS GOT SCARED, DA CHIKEN. LMAO LAFF AT HIM LADS

Most of the Loron burst out laughing, while a few of them were frustrated.

  • Troopas - CAN WE GO HOME YET? IM HUNGRY
  • Ray'loth - NO WES STAYIN TIL DEY SHOW DEMSELVES AN DEN WE EET DEM
  • Knar'gank - tbh i feel dat guy. its gettin borin heer.
  • Grak'tona - ALSO DA SUN IS MELTIN MA CROWN. YO DIS IS LAME
  • Voa'reak - wat. dunt tell me ya crown is AKSHULLY made of ice
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - his crown is akshully made of ice
  • Voa'reak - wow. always fout it wus glass

A few moments later after the dead silence, the Loron heard the sound of a huge spaceship above them. Then, as they looked up to the skies, they saw a heavily modified, completely chrome, Loron Sik Ship fly just above them. The ship fired a cannon and destroyed the bridge across the canyon, shocking the Loron. This bridge was iconic, having been famous among the Loron for decades for many of the duels that took place here, and Def'glasha annihilated it immediately. As it was destroyed, several shuttles flew just over them, out of which Def'glasha and a huge horde of bloodthirsty Loron, in even larger numbers than Fre'kloar had brought, jumped out, each glaring at Fre'kloar's troopas while licking their lips.

In front of them, Def'glasha appeared. He stood taller than Fre'kloar, due to his huge, thick armor that he wore.

  • Def'glasha - HAHA NICE TRY LOSAS. BUT ITS GOOD DAT YA CAME HEER SO I CAN SMASH YA ALL LIVE ON TV
  • Jol'kiar - OH MA DAYZ WHAI DID YA BLOW UP DAT BRIDGE MAN ITS PART OF OUR HISTORY
  • Def'glasha - ROGUE BOYZ HISTORY AINT IMPORTANT ANYMOAR. WEN I TAKE OVA ALL DA LORONZ AN UNITE DEM UNDA ME IM REWRITIN HISTORY. STARTIN WIV DA GANGSTAPEDIDA
  • Brag'klogga - HERESY!!!!!!! HERESY AN SACRILEJ!!!!!!!
  • Def'glasha - FRUM NOW ON DA HISTORY OF DA NOO LORON EMPIYA STARTS TODAY. IMMA CALL IT... uhhhh... DA NOO LORON EMPIYA
  • Fre'kloar - DATS A DUM NAME JUS LIKE YA MOM. IMMA SMASH YA FACE IN SO HARD I SWER
  • Def'glasha - WES REWRITIN HISTORY BOYZ. DA HISTORY BOOKS WILL NOW START FRUM DIS DAY: DA DAY DEF'GLASHA SMASHED FREKLOAR!!!!!!!!

In addition to Def'glasha himself, several other warbosses appeared alongside him, each wearing thick chrome-plated armor. The warbosses each matched Fre'kloar's own in terms of their skillset. Def'glasha even had a Loron Smasha warboss with him, presumably piloted by a chik, for which Fre'kloar had no equivalent as Rel'larutina had refused to join him. Each of Def'glasha's troopas began whirling their blades before he gave them the rallying cry:

  • Def'glasha - WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - MAN HAGTO NAO I KNO HAO YA FEEL. LOOK AT ALL DOSE COPYCAT DUMBOS!!!!! SMASH DEM!!!!!!!!!
  • Jol'kiar - DEY EVEN COPYRIGHTED DEIR CATCHPHRASE!!!!!!!!! BOYZ LETS GET DEM!!!!!!!!!
  • Knar'gank - im not one ta yell so: wagh
  • Ray'loth - IM DA BOSS OF ALL TROOPAS. WATCH ME BE DA BEST!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!

Leading the basic troopa infantry, Ray'loth charged forward surrounded by a mob of boyz. Normally, in battle, he would find many of them outrunning him to reach the front before they engaged their foes, but this time, he was clearly ahead as he did. He was confronted by a Loron working for Def'glasha, who upon making contact with him, immediately swung his arm and whacked Ray'loth down with force that Ray'loth had not expected, and had not seen before except from Grak'tona. This warboss he was fighting was clearly as hard as a rock.

  • Warboss - GET STOMPED PLEB
  • Ray'loth - WAT DA HELL HAO DIS??? OK DATS IT NAO IM ANGRY

Ray'loth picked himself up, and then while crouched, charged towards the warboss aiming for the waist. Ray'loth successfully managed to grab and pick up this warboss, then toss them to the floor and continue to stomp and them and throw punches. Evidently, he was winning the exchange, until he looked up to see his own boyz were being swarmed by Def'glasha's. With his own boyz completely overrun by a mob of bloodthirsty Loron, he briefly lost his grip as the warboss siezed the opportunity and lifted him by the throat before slamming him down.

  • Warboss - YOO CANT WIN
  • Ray'loth - ouch... nobody tell thr'aloy bout dis its embarrassin
  • Voa'reak - ITS OK ILL HELP... hold on lemme get a soundtrak fer dis

After pulling out his smartphone to quickly select a sound to blast from the speakers, Voa'reak found exactly what he was looking for and swooped down from the skies to fire at Def'glasha's boyz and assist Ray'loth, before he found himself knocked from the skies out of nowhere. He looked behind him, and he saw three chrome-plated Jetpakkas, aligned with Def'glasha. Each of them wore dark red goggles, and cackled as if their movements were synchronized.

  • Voa'reak - OI LOSA GET LOST. DA SKIES IS MA REALM
  • Jetpakkas - DA SKIES BELONG TA DEF'GLASHA. DEY DONT BELONG TA YOO HAS BEENS ANYMOAR
  • Voa'reak - NAO YOR ASKIN FOR A SMASHIN!!! ILL SEND YA DOWN INTO DA DIRT!!!

As Voa'reak took off once more, he successfully gunned one of them down, while dodging the others. For a moment, it seemed as if he were by far the better dogfighter, able to defeat the three of them at once. Rallying to him, Voa'reak's other Jetpakkas took off to the skies to fight the trio. Surprisingly, it seemed this trio of Jetpakkas were the only ones on Def'glasha's team at all, meaning they could easily outflank them. But they were soon proven wrong as Voa'reak's Jetpakkas found themselves gunned down by surface-to-air cannons. Looking down in bewilderment, Voa'reak saw that Def'glasha's Loron Tanks were equipped with weapons precise enough to target the Jetpakkas and shoot them down from the sky. Def'glasha's Jetpakkas then knocked down the rest of Voa'reak's group, before he himself was tackled to the floor by the trio.

  • Voa'reak - MAY DAY MAY DAY. OR MOST SPECIFICALLY: AAAAAAAAAAA
  • Naktor'zak - YO DUMBOS. YA FINK YOR CRAZIA DAN ME??? IMMA SHOW YA TROO VEHICLE POWA

With a look of pure glee, Naktor'zak began revving the engines of his tank, Da Propa Big Rogue Tank, along with a squad of four other tanks with him. These tanks were designed for one thing only: speed. As he then began to engage the thrusters of his tank, he then sped on ahead, bursting through dozens of Def'glasha's boyz running them over, in an attempt to charge straight-on at Def'glasha's own tanks. Just as he was about to hit them, however, he found his tank hit a bump and abruptly come to a halt, though he could not see what it was. He saw eventually that they had employed a shield generator around the battalion of tanks. Def'glasha, who was in the midst of tearing apart Fre'kloar's boyz, turned and laughed.

  • Def'glasha - HUR YOR IDIOTS FOR FINKIN DAT I WULD LET YA DO YA OLD TRIKS
  • Naktor'zak - YOO FINK YA PUNY SHIELD CAN STOP ME????? IMMA RUN IT DOWN DEN RUN OVA YOO!!! FAAAAAAAAAAAAST!!!!!

Naktor'zak began firing his cannons at the shields, and kept zooming into it to try and whittle it down. He did not find himself successful, until eventually the shields fell, allowing him to head straight into Def'glasha's battalion. These tanks were extremely well-armored, and did not go down as easily as he was used to, but nonetheless were destroyed with cannon fire or simply by ramming into them.

  • Naktor'zak - AHAHAHAHA HAO YA LIKE DAT DUMBOS?? MA TANKS TOO HOT FOR YA
  • Def'glasha - YEH DATS PRETTY GOOD BUT YOO JUS ACTIVATED MY TRAP CARD
  • Naktor'zak - NANI

As soon as he had cleared up the opposing tanks, several mines appeared from the ground beneath, and floated in the air. Naktor'zak could only look on in horror as each of them exploded, sending the tanks flying up into the air and crashing down, killing most of the Loron inside them. While Naktor'zak survived inside his tank, its wheels were destroyed completely and it was stuck upside down, rendering him immobile.

  • Naktor'zak - NOOOOOOO!!!! DATS SO CHEEEEEAP!!!!
  • Knar'gank - speekin of trap cards...

Knar'gank took Def'glasha entirely by surprise, as he stabbed Def'glasha's side and performed a roundhouse kick, knocking him down. Though Def'glasha's armor was extremely thick, Knar'gank's blades were built for this exact purpose: they melted through the armor and injected poison into Def'glasha's veins. Having performed his move, however, he found himself shot in the knee, and from looking up, he saw that Def'glasha had sneekas of his own armed with sniper rifles.

  • Knar'gank - oooh sneeky taktiks... but ya cant beet me wiv dose... im da best at dem

Knar'gank got up and threw down a smoke cloud to escape, as his own boyz dealt with Def'glasha's snipers. Searching for a new target around the battlefield, he wondered around a little, only to find Def'glasha standing right in front of him, apparently unaffected by the poison. Knar'gank's jaw dropped as Def'glasha pushed him to the ground and stomped on him.

  • Def'glasha - POISON? TRY BETTA LOL
  • Knar'gank - dis stinks
  • Zalk'don - I GOTTA DO EVERYFIN ON MA OWN DONT I? OK LADS FIRE DA BOMZ!!! BLOW DEM IDIOTS UP REEL GUD!!!

Zalk'don and his own boyz fired their own rocket launchers and grenades from a distance, greatly slowing down the advance of Def'glasha's mob. In a way, he acted as the artillery force. While doing so, however, the same Jetpakkas that had defeated Voa'reak then swooped down and fired a bomb in between Zalk'don's group, forcing them to duck and take cover, though none were harmed.

  • Zalk'don - YA CALL DAT A BOM???? MOR LIKE A WET FART I SWER. ILL SHOW YA BOMZ!!!

This time, Zalk'don fired heat-seeking missiles. He successfully shot each of the Jetpakkas out of the sky, grinning as they fell to the ground in a huge explosion. Out of the fire of the explosion, however, walked another tall Loron, plated in even thicker armor than Def'glasha, walking at a slow pace towards them. The artilley of Zalk'don's boyz fired at this Loron, though none of the bombs appeared to be piercing the shields or the armor. The Loron walked closer towards them, in an almost robotic fashion, before firing a shoulder-mounted missile in between them that exploded and killed many of them, while injuring the rest. Zalk'don himself was harmed greatly by the shrapnel and fell to the ground.

  • Zalk'don - OWOWOWOWWWWW!!! i gotta admit dat was a sik bom tho credit whers due
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - ok enuff of dis. TIME TA FREEZ AN BURN IDIOTS

Pulling out his freezflamas, Drizz'pyrokirk and his own squad of Loron walked forward blazing their flamethrowers. His boyz were in much better shape than the rest of Fre'kloar's forces, having attended Drizz'pyrokirk's mandatory workout sessions. In fact, Drizz'pyrokirk himself was still carrying protein shakes with him as he blazed through Def'glasha's forces. But along the way, he encountered another Cold Loron, who fired their own freezflama on an ice setting, freezing Drizz'pyrokirk's squad in seconds.

  • Cold Loron Warboss - YOR WEPON AINT WELL TUNED
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - HAO DARE YOO FREEZ MA BOYZ. IDIOT DO YA EVEN LIFT???
  • Cold Loron Warboss - I DUNNO BOUT LIFTIN BUT MA FREEZFLAMAS IS TONS BETTA DAN YORS. YOO SHULD GET BETTA GUNS
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - HAHAHA FUNNI JOKE...

Drizz'pyrokirk tossed his freezflamas to his side, cracked his neck, and then flexed.

  • Drizz'pyrokirk - I GOT DA BIGGEST GUNS HEER!!!!!!

Drizz'pyrokirk began posing, before dropping to do a few push-ups and jumping back up in a boxing position, glaring towards the Cold Loron with his fists ready. Instead, the Cold Loron simply engaged his freezflama and froze Drizz'pyrokirk into a block of ice, as the frozen Drizz'pyrokirk fell to the side. At this moment, an explosion of Dark Chronoscopic energy engulfed a good portion of Def'glasha's mob as Brag'klogga and his Flashiez entered the fray, their eyes shining with Essence as they blasted their foes. By his side were his two homies, Gan'fusis and Kosd'vaw.

  • Brag'klogga - HERETIKS ALL OF YOO. IM GONNA MAKE SUR DA GANGSTAPEDIA KNOS HAO DUM YA ALL IS. YOO DEFY DA CHOSEN OF ZR'AN AND K'AR!!!!
  • Gan'fusis - YEH!!! EET GOD JUICE DUMBOS!!! BET YA NEVER EXPECTED TA SEE US AGEN
  • Kosd'vaw - i dunt even kno hao i got heer tbh

Brag'klogga was successful in thinning out the endless horde of Def'glasha's troopas, before suddenly, time around him froze. Across the edge of the battlefield, a shaman affiliated with Def'glasha rose high above the sky and aimed his own staff towards them.

  • Shaman Warboss - NOW YOO WILL FEER DA DARKNESS DAT DARK DARK DARK
  • Brag'klogga - OH YEH? WELL I BET I WONT

The shaman raised up in the air even further, summoning several balls of Dark Chronoscopic energy to his side, about to release and throw them at Brag'klogga, Gan'fusis and Kosd'vaw, until Brag'klogga simply fired a beam of energy straight at the shaman and knocked him to the ground where he fell flat on his face.

  • Brag'klogga - wow is dis how yoo lot feel around me all da time
  • Hagto'Zhl - more or less yeh

Before he could celebrate his victory, Brag'klogga, his homies, and Hagto'Zhl themselves were raised in the air, trapped by Dark Chronoscopic chains binding them as the shaman chuckled.

  • Shaman - TIME BINDS YOO
  • Brag'klogga - WAT DA HELL I WAS SUPPOSED TA HAV WON
  • Hagto'Zhl - DIS EINT FAIR MAN ITS NOT MA TURN YET
  • Shaman - bruh my speed stat is higha dan yors its my turn
  • Hagto'Zhl - oh undastandable. WAIT WAT AM I SAYIN DIS SUKS
  • Gan'fusis - SEE BRAG DIS IS WHAI WE DONT HANG OUT AS MUCH ANYMOR
  • Kosd'vaw - no relly where da hell is we

As the shaman chuckled and attempted to tighten their Chronoscopic chains and freeze them in time, he was shot by a beam of light Chronoscopic energy. Turning to the source, they saw Kal'kuir aim a golden gun towards the shaman, which had banished him from the realm entirely.

  • Kal'kuir - YEH GET ABSOLUTLY REKT MA DOOD
  • Brag'klogga - NOT BAD KIDDO
  • Def'glasha - dats a decent gun ya got dere... shame if someone were ta SMASH IT TA BITS

Def'glasha was standing several feet away from Kal'kuir, and unable to reach him. As Kal'kuir aimed his gun towards Def'glasha, he found his arm grabbed firmly by a Loron standing behind him. It was the Cold Loron warboss affiliated with Def'glasha. The grip was far firmer than even Gratz'kaoz had been, and Kal'kuir felt the blood stop flowing to his hand as the Cold Loron picked up the gun and stomped on it. He then grabbed Kal'kuir by the throat and choked him, knocking him incapacitated, before tossing him aside.

  • Brag'klogga - wow i spoke too soon

The Cold Loron then pulled out his own weapon, and fired it straight at Brag'klogga between the eyes, knocking him unconscious. Before he could turn towards the others, he was knocked to his knees by gunfire from Traz'raka and a squad of strangely well-dressed Loron with tommy guns, pinning him down completely as he was forced to run for cover.

  • Traz'raka - DA MAFIA IS HEER BOYZ. TIME TA SWIM WIV DA FISHES
  • Def'glasha - OH DATS NEET IF I BEET YOO UP I CAN GET DA MAFIA ON MA SIDE
  • Traz'raka - IN YA DREEMS YA WEIRDO. DA MAFIA IS MINE!!!!

Def'glasha was about to engage them, before he was punched in the face by Fre'kloar.

  • Def'glasha - OH WE FINALLY GET TA FITE NOW? LOL GOOD I WAS WONDERIN WHER YA WAS
  • Fre'kloar - I WAS BUSY KILLIN YA IDIOT FOLLOWAS. NAO YOR NEXT
  • Def'glasha - OH WELL. YO GO TAKE CARE OF DEM

Wondering who Def'glasha was referring to, a large Loron Smasha flew in and landed in front of Traz'raka, aiming its weapons towards them, as they heard the cackling of its Norol pilot.

  • Norol Warboss - Hahaha! I've been looking for a challenge since I left the Rogue Boyz!
  • Traz'raka - hm ok dat IS a big gun. BUT MA LIL HOMIE IS BETTA DAN YA SMASHA. GUN HER DOWN LADS

Traz'raka and his mafia squad fired their tommy guns towards the Smasha's legs, hoping to cause it to topple over. Instead, the Smasha simply stomped forward, firing a flamethrower from one of its arms and a machine gun from the other, as it approached them. Traz'raka gulped as he saw his own Loron be defeated, before then charging towards the Smasha himself and climbing on top of it, firing Lil Homie directly into the cockpit.

  • Norol Warboss - Get OFF of me, you pest!
  • Traz'raka - FITE ME IRL NOT IN DAT ROBOT SEE WAT HAPPENS
  • Norol Warboss - Are you... sure you want to do that?
  • Traz'raka - DO WAT? GUN YA FACE? YA BET I DO
  • Norol Warboss - Well, alright, it's your funeral.

To Traz'raka's surprise, the Smasha's cockpit opened, and a Norol popped out. The Norol quickly pulled out a pepper spray can and sprayed it directly into Traz'raka's eye, then kicked him off the Smasha before getting back into the cockpit and stomping on him with the Smasha. The mafia boss screamed as he held onto his eyes, while his Lil Homie made confused robotic noises all the while.

  • Norol Warboss - Never send a man to do a woman's job!
  • Rogue Geek - That would be a correct statement. Which is why you shall now face me.

The Norol's smasha turned around to find the Rogue Geek on her own, aiming a huge cannon squarely at the Smasha, before firing it. The Smasha was immediately knocked off balance and fell to the ground, as the Rogue Geek approached the Norol slowly, continuing to whittle away at the Smasha's shields. The Norol coughed as one of the Smasha's arms was destroyed entirely.

  • Norol Warboss - You smeared my paint! You pest!
  • Rogue Geek - Hmpf. Loyal or rebel, Loron are always so incompetent...
  • Norol Warboss - Try some of this!

The Smasha then engaged thrusters on its backpack, and fly above the Rogue Geek, to land on her and smash her. The Rogue Geek rolled out of the way to dodge and fired again, only for the Smasha to this time kick the Rogue Geek up into the air. The Smasha then flew up, following the Rogue Geek, and grabbed her, before tossing her to the ground below and then firing another cannon. The Rogue Geek's remote body had been destroyed in the explosion entirely, though it left the Smasha too distracted to notice a pair of highly advanced tomahawks piercing its hull as Gol'thabex challenged it.

  • Gol'thabex - neva send a woman ta do a THUGS JOB
  • Norol Warboss - Damn mercenary! You'll pay for that!
  • Gol'thabex - nah akshully i got paid fer dat lol
  • Norol Warboss - ... Granted.

As the Norol Warboss turned her smasha around and fired at Gol'thabex, she found herself overrun by several other Thugs Fer Dosh that toppled her Smasha and began crushing it under their feet. Gol'thabex smirked, until the Cold Loron Warboss affiliated with Def'glasha froze each of them in place, and turned his glare towards Gol'thabex.

  • Cold Loron Warboss - DAT WAS MA BEST SMASHA
  • Gol'thabex - oh ya gonna cry den? IM GONNA SHANK YA IDIOT
  • Cold Loron Warboss - TRY ME DEN

As the Cold Loron aimed his freezflama towards Gol'thabex, he found it had been destroyed by Gol'thabex' axes. Growling, the Cold Loron pulled out a flamethrower instead and fired it at Gol'thabex' direction, apparently irritated greatly as Gol'thabex destroyed more machinery. Gol'thabex continued to throw axes before the two simply charged towards one another. However, the Cold Loron got the better of the exchange, as Gol'thabex fell, before the Cold Loron's knee came down directly on Gol'thabex' face, stomping him.

  • Gol'thabex - I DUNT GET PAID ENUFF FOR DIS
  • Cold Loron Warboss - ALL DIS TEKK HEER IS MINE. AN ITS BETTA DAN YOR STOOPID TEKK. ME AN DEFGLASHA WES GONNA CRUSH DA WHOL ROGUE BOYZ FER GOOD AN PROOV WES DA BEST

As the Warboss was distracted gloating, he suddenly found himself subject to the fists of both Hagto'Zhl and Grak'tona striking him from each side, before Jol'kiar gave him a forceful kick to the back to knock him forward into the ground.

  • Cold Loron Warboss - CHEETAS. FITE ME ONE ON ONE LIKE TROO LORONZ
  • Jol'kiar - NORMALLY I WULD AGREE BUT YOO LOT PISSED ME OFF TOO MUCH
  • Hagto'Zhl - MAN I DONT REELY CARE AT DIS POINT. I JUS REELY WANNA KILL YOO ALL
  • Grak'tona - DA KING DEMANDS YOO IDIOTS STOP LOOSIN!!!!!!!!
  • Cold Loron Warboss - FIRST OF ALL YOR A FALSE KING. SECOND OF ALL WEN WE REWRITE DA HOLY BOOKS WES GONNA WRITE YOR LINEAJ OUT OF IT ENTIRELY. THIRD OF ALL... akshully i forgot da third point but YOO GET DA IDEA
  • Grak'tona - OK DATS IT. OFF WIV HIS HED!!!!

As Jol'kiar and Hagto'Zhl held the Cold Loron Warboss down, Grak'tona beckoned towards another of his own Loron to hand him a large axe used for decapitation. As Grak'tona lifted it and swung it on the Cold Loron Warboss' head, he found that he did not pierce flesh. Instead, he had cut through metal, and what fell off was not the head of a Loron, but of a robot. A robot that looked, sounded, and acted entirely like a Loron.

  • Grak'tona - WAT. DA. HELL!!!
  • Jol'kiar - i knew sumfin was off. HE WAS A FLIPPIN ROBIT
  • Hagto'Zhl - PLOT TWIST. i dont particularly care i jus wanna kill dem but PLOT TWIST
  • Grak'tona - HOW DARE DEFGLASHA MOK US BY SENDIN FAKE LORONZ TA TRY AN SIEZE DA CROWN. YO LADS LETS GANG UP ON DEF AN END DIS???
  • Jol'kiar - YEH. DAT PRIK SPAT ON TRADISHON SO NAO I HAV NO REESUN TA FOLLOW IT FOR HIM EETHA

As they looked around to find Def'glasha, they noticed that most of their own troopas had fallen. Any on Fre'kloar's team that were still alive were either badly injured or waving white flags. The Leedas looked to one another in dismay, as the battlefield appeared to be dispersing. Fre'kloar himself, having engaged in battle with Def'glsaha, was himself coughing blood and had fallen to his knees. Def'glasha looked towards the Leedas and laughed.

  • Def'glasha - YOO LOT IS NO MATCH FER ME
  • Jol'kiar - STOOPID STOOPID KID SPITTIN ON TRADISHON I SWER IM GONNA ENJOY BEETIN YOO UP
  • Grak'tona - DA CROWN DEMANDS HIS DEFF
  • Hagto'Zhl - IM DA BEST AN DATS ALL DA MATTAS
  • Def'glasha - DERES ONE PROBLEM: DERES HUNDREDS OF US AN THREE OF YOO

Fre'kloar coughed more, before picking himself back up and slapping Def'glasha, knocking him to the ground, and spitting on him.

  • Fre'kloar - FOUR
  • Def'glasha - hurhur ok yor betta dan i thought... OK HOW BOUT DIS. DA FOUR OF YOO AGENST ME. NONE OF MA TROOPAS FITE DEY JUS WATCH. WINNA TAKES DA ROGUE BOYZ
  • Grak'tona - OH YEH WELL I HOPE YOR REDI TA GET REKT IN FRONT OF YA LADS YA PESANT
  • Hagto'Zhl - IM DA SON OF ZR'AN AND K'AR (somehow) DAT MEENS I CAN KICK YA ASS
  • Jol'kiar - FREKLOAR MAN DIS IS IT. LETS SMASH DIS BOZO
  • Fre'kloar - YEH!!! FOR DA ROGUE BOYZ!!!!!!!!!!!

The troopas all formed a circle around the four Leedas and Def'glasha. Def'glasha cracked his neck and stretched his arms, before rolling his arms in front of them ready to fight. He then tossed all of his guns to his side, ready for a fist fight. The tall, imposing, heavily-armored Loron smirked as he pointed towards them and charged. Fre'kloar rose his own fists while Jol'kiar took out his trusty shanka, while a twisted grin grew on Hagto'Zhl's face as his body was enveloped by a demonic aura, and Grak'tona stood in front of them with his ice spitta ready to endure the blow as he was so famous for.

  • Grak'tona - DA KING IS A WALL AGENST ALL DUMBOS. YOR NOT WORFFY!!!

Def'glasha did not slow his charge, and instead simply hit Grak'tona, knocking him down to the ground a little. The Leedas took their opportunity to pile on him and kick him while Jol'kiar stabbed him. However, as Def'glasha sustained damage, his armor became more energized, and a burst of energy released from his armor, blasting each of them back, as he stood up and laughed.

  • Def'glasha - DA MOAR YA HIT ME DA MOAR POWAFUL I BECOME
  • Grak'tona - WAT DA HELL
  • Fre'kloar - YOR SO CHEEP I SWER
  • Jol'kiar - BAK IN MA DAYZ WE DIDNT DO DUM STUFF LIKE DIS. yo lads i fink we gotta jus damag him enuff dat he dies regardless but his armor seems ta absorb da damag as kinetic energy. leest dats wat kalkuir told me
  • Hagto'Zhl - MAN JUS GRAB DIS IDIOT AN SQUEEZE HIM IN HIS STOOPID TIN CAN ARMOR TIL HE POPS
  • Def'glasha - IM FREEKIN INVINCIBUL!!!!!!!!!

All the Leedas stood up and charged at Def'glasha again, unleashing whatever they had at their disposal - punches, kicks, blades, ice, Essence - to deal with him once and for all. As Def'glasha endured the blows, he then charged up his own fists to throw more powerful punches, knocking them further away. In spite of his armor, Def'glasha was very agile, capable of dodging many of their attacks when he wanted to. But most of the time, he was willing to sustain the damage in order to unleash it at them. As they continued to fight him, however, they saw him sweat through his armor. It seemed that there was only so much he could take.

  • Hagto'Zhl - MAN WAT IS DIS GEEZA MADE OF??? AND WHAI DIDNT KALKUIR EVA COM UP WIV DIS?? I WANT ONE TOO TBH
  • Fre'kloar - FORGET BOUT DAT. HE CANT ENDURE DIS FOREVA
  • Def'glasha - MAYBE NOT... BUT... NEITHA CAN YOO!!!!!!

Def'glasha beat his chest rapidly, as he charged towards Jol'kiar and grabbed him by the throat, then thrust him into the ground, causing a crater as Jol'kiar hit his head. He then threw punches rapidly towards Grak'tona, until even Grak'tona had to fell back to his knees.

  • Grak'tona - OW MAN. HES TOO FAST!!!
  • Jol'kiar - urk ma hed...
  • Def'glasha - NUFFIN WILL STOP DA NOO LORON EMPIYA. WES GONNA TAKE OVA DA WHOL OONIVERSE!!!!!!!!!!
  • Hagto'Zhl - YA MOMS DUM!!!!!

Hagto'Zhl became enraged, as the Dark Chronoscopic surrounding him grew in intensity, and Hagto'Zhl himself grew in size. The enlarged Hagto'Zhl was now double the size of Def'glasha, and threw several more punches towards Def'glasha. This time, Def'glasha's armor began to fall apart, as they saw debris from his armor fall off around him. Def'glasha began coughing in pain.

  • Hagto'Zhl - AN YOR REBELLIONS DUM TOO!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Def'glasha - hurhurhur... yoo got som pretty good dad tbh...
  • Hagto'Zhl - DA BEST
  • Def'glasha - ... SHAME HES NOT GONNA HELP YOO!!!!!!

Def'glasha then stood up, and fired a wrist-mounted cannon at Hagto'Zhl. The cannon fired pure, light, Chronoscopic energy towards Hagto'Zhl, immediately conflicting with Hagto'Zhl's own, causing him to shrink back to his normal size, as Hagto'Zhl was engulfed in two conflicting energies surround him, both fighting for control, while Hagto'Zhl was unable to move. He screamed in pain until he fell over, unconcious.

  • Def'glasha - WEN I TAKE OVA DA LORON WES GONNA REJECT YOR OLD GOD AN WORSHIP A NOO ONE: DA GOD DEF'GLASHA!!!!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - DIS IS LITERALLY DA WORST FING IVE EVA HEARD AN IVE HAD TA WORK WIV ZRAHGLOTH PLENTY OF TIMES. YOO DISGUST ME
  • Def'glasha - YEERS OF DA ROGUE BOYZ LEEDASHIP BEIN OUT OF TOUCH WIV ITS PEEPZ IS GONNA COM TO AN END. DA LORONZ DEMAND BETTA LEEDAS. LEEDAS DAT ENT SO USELESS AN LAZI. IM GONNA LEED DA LORONZ TA VICTORY!!!!!!!

Fre'kloar retained his fighting pose, though he could not help look around, seeing the defeated Leedas, Poshiez and Warbosses. He would never admit it, but he was genuinely intimidated, for the first time since the end of Da Reckoning. Def'glasha could sense this, and smirked. He did not lift a finger, however. He simply waited for Fre'kloar to make his move. Eventually, anger took hold on the Propa Big Boss' mind and he charged at Def'glasha, intending to punch him. Def'glasha took the punch straight to the stomach, and another to the face. But once again, the energy in his suit built up, and Def'glasha unleashed it straight at Fre'kloar, causing him to fall to his face once more. Def'glasha's own Loron cheered, many of them throwing slurs towards Fre'kloar, and hailing the end of the Rogue Boyz.

Def'glasha chuckled as he grabbed Fre'kloar by the back of his neck, and roared, beating his chest with his other armor. Def'glasha then looked Fre'kloar in the eyes.

  • Def'glasha - ANY LAST WORDS?
  • Fre'kloar - ugh... ya mite defeet me... but da rogue spirit will NEVA DIE

Def'glasha laughed once more, but before he could raise his fist once more, he found himself immediately caught by a beam of energy that suspended him in the air. Def'glasha was apparently paralyzed, and attempted to move to look around, though he was unable to in his suit. He looked upwards, still able to move his eyes, and saw Da Propa Big Rogue Smasha from the air.

  • Rel'larutina - Alright, boys, time to go home.
  • Def'glasha - AR YA KIDDIN ME???????
  • Fre'kloar - RELLARUTINA??? OH MA DAYZ ITS PROBS DA FIRST TIME IM HAPPY TA SEE YA
  • Rel'larutina - Yeah, well, don't get used to it. I was considering not coming, but then I heard what Def'glasha's plans for chikz under his empire was, and let's just say I'm not a fan.
  • Def'glasha - DEFF TA FEMINISM
  • Fre'kloar - man i swer dis is not da end. WES RESOLVIN DIS ANOTHA DAY YA MUPPET. AN YOR TOTALLY GOIN DOWN

The Loron following Def'glasha screamed in outrage, as Rel'larutina teleported each of the Loron back onto the Propa Big Rogue Krooza. None of them were in a position to continue to fight, and though Def'glasha's forces had been reduced to a fraction of what they once were, she knew she could not take them out alone. Thus, she allowed them to retreat and fight another day. Def'glasha cursed at the sky as she warped each of them back, before herself teleporting away, dropping him and allowing him to regain his footing.

The battle was a bad look for Fre'kloar, and if his reputation was not already in tatters, it certainly was now. To be a respected boss that loses a fight to an upstart Loron, and be rescued by a Chik of all people, was an utter embarassment for him. Planets would not view this battle as legitimate, and they would continue to abandon Fre'kloar, turning to Def'glasha's cause. A Loron that was capable of defeating the four most powerful Loron all at once was nothing to scoff at.

Still, something wasn't right about Def'glasha. The technology behind his armor was far beyond that which even Kal'kuir had been capable of before, and the weaponry of his own Loron seemed impeccable, too much so to have been developed by normal Loron tekkas and mekkas. And if one of Def'glasha's warbosses was not in fact a Loron, but a perfect robotic replica, then who knew how many others were like that?

Nonetheless, this escaped the eyes of the average Loron viewing this. A civil war had erupted amongst the Loron, and the tides were turning quickly in Def'glasha's favor. If they did not do something, the Rogue Boyz would be no more.


The Heist[]

Having suffered a tremendous defeat at the hand of Def'glasha, each of the Rogue Boyz returned to the Krooza after a day of rest and healing. They felt a sense of shame and embarassment that they'd not felt before in their lives, and as they saw the Rogue Geek, whom had a new body constructed for her, display more screens of planets abandoning the Rogue Boyz for Def'glasha, they felt a sense of dismay.

For the first time in their lives, they were willing to listen to what a Norol had to say. Or at least, half willing.

  • Rel'larutina - I'll be nice and spare the "I told you so" rhetoric for another day, because I think you all know what we have to do now.
  • Grak'tona - yeh i do...
  • Rel'larutina - Good. So, let's star-
  • Grak'tona - BUILD AN INTADIMENSHONAL WORMHOLE AN FIND DA DIMENSHON IN WHICH I BECOM KING FOREVA AN MOOV DERE AN LIVE DERE FOREVA AN NEVA WORRY BOUT DESE LOSAS AGEN
  • Rel'larutina - ... You're hopeless. Alright, I'm done.

Before Rel'larutina returned to her quarters, Fre'kloar spoke up:

  • Fre'kloar - man i hate ta say dis but, yoo wus rite. we shulda lissened
  • Hagto'Zhl - MAN DIS SUKS. I WANNA GO BAK TO DA OLD DAYS WHER WE JUS SHANKED UNO AN WUS HAPPY. NONE OF THIS REBELLION CRAP
  • Rel'larutina - Agreed. And we can't defeat Def'glasha the traditional way, which means we need to talk about the heist.
  • Jol'kiar - yeh. bak in ma dayz we didnt lissen ta chikz but today we gotta do wat rellarutina sez cus MAN DAT KID GOT US GUD. WAT DA HELL WAS DAT???
  • Kal'kuir - by my calculashons def'glasha uses som suit fingy dat absorbs da kinetic energy. now it doesnt blok da damage but it allows him ta use it bak on yoo. man hes powered by crazy tekk
  • Gol'thabex - ive only seen dis sort of fing in da blak market very rarily. an neva made by loronz
  • Kal'kuir - but deres no way deez geezas ar jus usin tekk dey got frum da blak market tho. its too customized an too well-prepared fer loron bodies. which suggests ta me dat dey hav som SUPA powaful tekka workin for dem
  • Fre'kloar - we can worry bout dat lata. fer nao lets discuss da heist

The Rogue Geek displayed a hologram of Def'glasha's hideout. The entire complex was a fortress situated on top of an island, which comprised a mountain out in the middle of an oceanic planet. The fortress was heavily guarded, and much like the armor of Def'glasha's boyz, painted chrome entirely. Searchlights could be seen around the building, with huge cannons aimed at anyone that approached.

  • Rogue Geek - That is Def'glasha's base. It is designed to withstand invasion forces using both its orbital defenses in space and defenses on land. Pitting it in the middle of an island prevents a ground force from landing there easily.
  • Knar'gank - tuff cookie ta crak dere. ive infiltrated plenty of bases in ma time but dat one looks hard
  • Brag'klogga - cant even use ma AWESOME SHAMAN POWAS ta send us in cus he has TRAITA SHAMANS dere. SO DUM DIS DAYZ NOT COMIN
  • Zalk'don - also da geeza has som sheeld generata dats hard ta break throo an by da looks of it if ya try do dat yoo will eventually get rekt by da cannons becuz deres no good place ta park
  • Rel'larutina - And so, I hope you all know how to swim.
  • Fre'kloar - well yeh cours we do. if none of ya do datd be EMBARRASSIN
  • Naktor'zak - well i did but im kinda stukk in a tank atm lol
  • Rel'larutina - Naktor'zak and I come in later. But in order to get access to the base, we'll drop in through pods from the Krooza which will land in the surrounding waters, and then swim up to the shore. From there, we can climb into our different areas of the base in order to disable it, and eventually defeat Def'glasha.
  • Knar'gank - yeh so take a lesson frum a profeshonal heer. no screemin, no gunfiya, no warcries. be SILENT
  • Zalk'don - STEALFF MISHONS SOUND PROPA BORIN MAN
  • Rel'larutina - Don't worry, Zalk'don, you're up first.
  • Zalk'don - uh wat

Rel'larutina walked towards the hologram and pointed to a small tower on the far western side of the base.

  • Rel'larutina - After you climb here, you'll set up TNT in the arsenal nearby. You'll then detonate it, and from the top of the tower, continue firing bombs from a distance to cause a distraction.
  • Zalk'don - OH OK DAT SOUNDS SIK
  • Rel'larutina - And from there, we need to disable the shield generator. It's well-guarded, but that shouldn't be a problem for our sneeka boss.
  • Knar'gank - yeh. dey wont even notice me hurhur
  • Rel'larutina - Once you take out the guards, Kal'kuir is going to hack into the shield generator and deactivate it. He'll then need your help getting him through the next part of the base in order to hack the base's surface-to-air cannons.
  • Kal'kuir - YEH WES GONNA SHOW DEM DUMBOS WHOS DA BEST MEKKA/TEKKA
  • Rel'larutina - And once those are out, Voa'reak will be able to fly in and drop off Ray'loth, who can fight the garrison inside the base. Hopefully, he can block their path towards Kal'kuir.
  • Ray'loth - VOA IF YA DROP ME IN DA WATA YOR GOIN TO DA BRIG
  • Voa'reak - MAN YA TALK LIKE IM NOT DA BEST JETPAKKA EVA
  • Rel'larutina - Of course, there's the matter off the cannons that stop me and Naktor'zak from blowing up the entrance. Voa'reak will pick up Zalk'don to fly around and keep them distracted, but that won't be enough. Traz'raka will need his gun for that.
  • Traz'raka - me an lil homie will see it don
  • Rel'larutina - You, Lil Homie, and also Drizz'pyrokirk. Because you'll need help defeating the sharks that are surrounding the cannons, so I figured hey, why not just freeze the water completely and let you cross that way.
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - cant disagree wiv dat logic tbh
  • Rel'larutina - Now, with this done, we just need to defeat the tekkas/mekkas that are responsible for Def'gasha's suit. With any luck, we'll learn how it works. In order to intimidate him with brute force, I figured I'd put Hagto'Zhl and Gol'thabex on that.

Gol'thabex cracked his neck while Hagto'Zhl cracked his knuckles.

  • Hagto'Zhl - oh ill be scarin dem alrite
  • Gol'thabex - deyz gonna be intimidated by ma AXES
  • Rel'larutina - After this, they'll definitely send in reinforcements. This base includes teleporters, so we can't just shoot them out of the sky. Which is fine; we have Grak'tona to fight them, with Jol'kiar's help, so we don't need to.
  • Grak'tona - SO BE IT. DA KING WILL PUNISH DA PESANTS
  • Jol'kiar - BAK IN MA DAY WE DIDNT TELEPORT WE JUS WALKED WHER WE WANTED TA GO (or we flew if yoo were old an cool like me)
  • Rel'larutina - So, with that done, and everyone finished, Naktor'zak and I will fly in to destroy the gate at the front, allowing us to eventually destroy the rocks inside the cave. With any luck, that'll cause an avalanche and we can bring down the mountain with enough firepower, destroying the base. So, Def'glasha will drown before we even have to fight him. And... I think that's it.
  • Brag'klogga - OI WAT BOUT ME THO
  • Rel'larutina - Oh, right, I didn't want to mention it because you'll be paired with the Rogue Geek, but after Voa'reak drops off Zalk'don, he'll come to pick you up so both of you can defeat their shamans.
  • Brag'klogga - I GOTTA BE PAIRED WIV KALKUIRS WEIRD WIFE???? AW MAN
  • Rel'larutina - Told you you wouldn't like it, but since she's a robot, she's the hardest to damage with Essence.
  • Brag'klogga - I SUPPOS SO. FINE DEN. SO LONG AS WE KILL ALL DEM TRAITA SHAMANS I DONT CARE
  • Rel'larutina - Good. Any questions?
  • Fre'kloar - CANT FINK OF ANYFIN. OK LADS WES GONNA DO DIS HEIST AN YA BEST BE SIK AT IT... tho i jus noticed ya didnt give me a role in dis???

Rel'larutina looked towards the Rogue Geek, and then nodded a little, before she spoke.

  • Rel'larutina - Fre'kloar... With all due respect...
  • Rogue Geek - We didn't include you in the plan because you are useless.
  • Rel'larutina - Well, I wouldn't say it that way, but... yeah, I couldn't really think of anything for you to do.

All the Loron looked at them and at Fre'kloar in surprise.

  • Fre'kloar - WAT DA HELL? WHAI AM I "USELESS" MAN IM DA BOSS. DA STRONGEST ONE IN DIS ROOM!!!
  • Rel'larutina - Well, once upon a time, you were. You were the most respected Loron that ever lived. But, let's just say your track record...
  • Rogue Geek - You led the Loron to their doom in the Reckoning and almost led them to their doom again just a day ago. You cannot be trusted to succeed.
  • Rel'larutina - Yeah, again, I wouldn't have said it like that, but... Everyone else does their role better than you. Unless you can think of something you can do here?
  • Fre'kloar - DIS... DIS IS AN OUTRAGE!! I EVEN WENT AS FAR AS GIV YOO TWO MA FULL ATTENSHON FOR DIS AN YA TREET ME LIKE IM USELESS!!
  • Rogue Geek - Not like you are useless. You just are useless.

Fre'kloar clenched his fists in rage, got up from his seat and stormed off the room altogether, kicking walls and furniture along the way while rambling until he could no longer be heard. The rest of the Loron looked around with mixed feelings.

  • Hagto'Zhl - uh. dat was kinda mean. an i say dis bein da most evil one heer
  • Rel'larutina - I wanted to include him, but I just couldn't think of a team that I could trust him on, you know? Fre'kloar's track record of late just means he's too likely to screw it up by not sticking to the plan. And we all know he can't face Def'glasha in person. So the only solution is to drown Def'glasha and avoid the fight completely.
  • Jol'kiar - man dis dont feel rite. wes drownin da guy insted of killin him like a propa loron an wes doin it without our boss. but at da same time i cant fink of anyfin betta.
  • Rogue Geek - Indeed. When they don't play by Loron tradition, we shouldn't either. We must be as ruthless as they are.
  • Grak'tona - YEH. DA PESANT REBELLION SHALL BE DROWNED AN ALL DA ROGUE BOYZ WILL SEE KING GRAK'TONA AS DEIR SAVIOR
  • Rel'larutina - Which reminds me. Since Fre'kloar won't be leading this battle, the leader will be...

Grak'tona had a huge grin on his face, expecting her to give the leadership role to him, until instead she turned to Hagto'Zhl.

  • Rel'larutina - You. You're clearly the best suited to this job.
  • Hagto'Zhl - huh? reely? surprising tbh
  • Jol'kiar - HEY BUT IM OLDA AN WISA
  • Rel'larutina - It was tough competition, but we went with Hagto'Zhl ultimately because you're an extremely good second-in-command. You're very good at seeing the clearer picture when ranked below a leader, which as the leader yourself, you don't quite get the same vision of.
  • Jol'kiar - eeeeeeeehh i gues i can see wher yor comin from
  • Rel'larutina - Don't worry, Grak'tona, your role here is still important. You're responsible for the getaway plan.
  • Grak'tona - MAN I SWER DIS IS BELOW ME. WELL IN MA CANON IM DA LEEDA SO YOR DECISHON IS NONCANON
  • Rel'larutina - Eh. Sure. So, any more questions before we get ready? Given how rapidly worlds are falling, we should do this sooner rather than later.
  • Hagto'Zhl - nah wes gud ta go. everyon go prepare yaselves den cause dis is gonna be tuff
  • Rel'larutina - Good. Oh, one last thing: There will be a pizza party just before the heist for morale.
  • Brag'klogga - BLESSED PRE-BATTLE PIZZA
  • Jol'kiar - IDUNNO BOUT DAT BUT IM UP FER PIZZA PARTIES IN GENERAL


The Heist of Ages[]

Just before they were about to set off to raid Def'glasha's base, Rel'larutina and the Rogue Geek reconvened one last time to ensure that their plan was foolproof. Though neither had much investment in the health of the other Leedas and Warbosses specifically, they both knew they would not survive under Def'glasha's leadership. So for them, victory here was extremely important. But also, neither of them were used to having their opinions respected by the other Loron as much.

  • Rel'larutina - So, they're all up for this, right? I know Drizz'pyrokirk has been giving them workout sessions every night, but I need to make sure they're combat ready.
  • Rogue Geek - They are. Loron physiology is efficient enough that it would not take them that long to regain their composure... They were just too lazy to do it until they nearly faced death.
  • Rel'larutina - That's true. The last encounter with Def'glasha should've shocked them into preparing properly this time. Still, I did my best to make sure that each of them were put in a role where them being themselves would actually help, and not, y'know, ruin everything... But I still don't have a lot of confidence in them.
  • Rogue Geek - I have no confidence in any of them, and I never had. But what can I do? I am this empire's head AI, after all. I'd prefer these idiots over the other idiots.
  • Rel'larutina - You and me both, sister.
  • Hagto'Zhl - OI LADS LETS GET REDY

Meanwhile, Hagto'Zhl had gathered up the rest of the Leedas and Warbosses, barring Fre'kloar, before they would be shot off in a submarine pod that would land them close to Def'glasha's base. The Rogue Krooza was now located in the same star system as Def'glasha's base, but still several planets away so as to avoid detection. Their blast from the ship to the planet would take several hours stuck in a pod first, for which none of them were excited. But they were excited to tear about Def'glasha's home turf.

  • Hagto'Zhl - ONE LAST TIME: WES GONNA RAP DA ZRAN AN KAR RAP DEN WES GONNA GET REDY FER TWO HOURS OF BOREDOM
  • Ray'loth - TURN DA VOLUM OF DA BOOMBOX UP
  • Grak'tona - I HAV FAITH IN YOO LOT. MA ROYAL BODYGUARDS HAV NEVA LET ME DOWN THUS FAR
  • Voa'reak - wow dats da nicest fing ya eva said eva
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - yeh im suprised too but NO WASTIN TIME NOW. YA BEST RAP DA RAP OR IMMA MAKE YA DO TWENTY MOAR LAPS
  • Jol'kiar - STOOPID KID IM DA SIKKEST RAPPA EVA
  • Brag'klogga - DIS SONGS COMIN!!!!!!

As the boombox played the music, each of them rapped the "Zr'An and K'ar rap", though the only one of them who was audible was Brag'klogga, as none of the rest of them knew the words. As such, they just mumbled under their breath until the beat was finished, and then cheered. As they were finished, Rel'larutina and the Rogue Geek arrived.

  • Rel'larutina - So, one last thing: you did all remember the plan, right?
  • Knar'gank - yeh. well i do at leest
  • Jol'kiar - nah wes serius bout dis. everyun knos wat ta do OR I SWER IMMA SLAP YALL IF YA MESS UP
  • Rel'larutina - Wait, really? You actually remembered it? Because I was just gonna say that I'll be here with the Rogue Geek monitoring the situation and I'll just send commands over your ear pieces.
  • Voa'reak - i meen i wouldnt oppose dat
  • Traz'raka - ya forgot ya role didnt ya
  • Voa'reak- NO............ ok maybe a bit
  • Rel'larutina - Yeah, I thought one of you would at least. But, good to see you're all ready. Strap yourselves into your pods, and get ready.

Those Loron who would land on the planet using the submarines - Zalk'don, Kal'kuir, Knar'gank, Brag'klogga, and the Rogue Geek's remote form - each entered the submarine pod, which blasted them through hyperspace to land in the ocean nearby. This allowed them to successfully bypass any orbital defenses, and arrive on the ocean floor. Each of them were capable of swimming, though Brag'klogga struggled a little and accidentally enlarged some of the sea creatures with Dark Chronoscopic energy along the way, making the path upwards more dangerous than it needed to be.

Nonetheless, they swam up to the surface. Zalk'don was first. As commanded, he climbed up to the tower on the far western side of the base, with a warehouse nearby that contained many of Def'glasha's weapons. This appeared to be his arsenal. A grin grew on Zalk'don's face as he begun taking explosives out of his armor and arming them around, forcing himself not to giggle out loud and not alert too much attention to himself. Once all were primed, he grinned again as he took out a big red button and pressed it, causing all of the TNT he had placed everywhere to explode in a massive spectacle. As he did, the Rogue Geek contacted him on his ear piece.

  • Rogue Geek - Wow. You succeeded.
  • Zalk'don - EET BOMZ AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
  • Rogue Geek - You do see where the tower is, correct? Climb it.
  • Zalk'don - IM WORKIN ON IT

Zalk'don sprinted out and ran behind the tower, facing away from the rest of the base, and jumped up to begin climbing. Loron were large enough with strong grips that Zalk'don had little issue climbing across the stone wall to the top. As he reached the top, he grabbed the guard standing there and threw him down into the ocean below. Once that was done, he looked down below to the enemy troops and, with a bigger grin, took out his shoulder-mounted missile launchers.

  • Zalk'don - OI IDIOTS. WATCH DIS!!!!

With that, he started firing wildly down at them, cackling maniacally as he did so. The chrome-plated Loron looked up in shock before many of them were blown to bits. An alarm was immediately raised, as several dozen more Loron began charging towards the tower, only for Zalk'don to rain more missile fire down and prevent them from reaching him. A few other Loron already inside the tower tried to climb through it, but they were destroyed by mines that Zalk'don had placed, caused the ladder to reach the roof to be destroyed. The only way to reach the tower now was to climb it.

  • Rel'larutina - Good work. Keep blowing them up!
  • Zalk'don - AHAHAHA TAKE DIS! AND DIS! AND DIS AND DIS AND DIS!!!!

Zalk'don just kept firing more and more explosives at the enemies, taking immense delight in every explosion.

Meanwhile, on the southern side of the island, having seen the fireworks let off by Zalk'don, Knar'gank and Kal'kuir swam up to the beach, ready to infiltrate the base. Kal'kuir fired an electric blast at one of the caves, which deactivated a lot of the mines on their way, allowing them to infiltrate through a cave system that would lead under ground. He then planted a few small devices on the ground of the beach while Knar'gank glared at him, confused.

  • Kal'kuir - so basically yeh wen da enemies walk up ta it it turns out its a TRAP an it akshully spawns TURRETS FRUM DA GROUND HAHA
  • Knar'gank - hm. suppos dat works tho id hav preferred to jus go and sneek
  • Kal'kuir - can ya go in an sneek past da lasas coz i dunno how ta do dat ive not watched enuff James Bond films

With a silent nod, Knar'gank's body turned invisible as he moved on ahead. Kal'kuir could not even hear his footsteps as the Sneeka Boss easily bypassed the defenses, before fiddling with them from behind in order to disable them. Only once that was done did he reappear, giving Kal'kuir a hand signal to show he could approach. Kal'kuir ran through, but his metal armor began clanging against the rocks along the way, making several echo sounds. As he reached Knar'gank, he chuckled at the sound of his own echoes.

  • Kal'kuir - yo dats sik. ECHO!!!!!!
  • Knar'gank - man shush! do ya want da whol base ta heer ya? get moovin
  • Kal'kuir - oh yor rite i forgot dis is a stelth mishon. wait hold on one sik i got dis supa sik invenshon

As he was speaking, he stood back, and dropped a small box on the floor. To Knar'gank's surprise, the box appeared to grow six legs, and was able to crawl across the floor and move through the base. Kal'kuir was controlling a remotely controlled spider, and used it to move further through the dark cave in search of a room at the bottom. Eventually, he found it.

  • Kal'kuir - ya see dat room? da one wiv like fifteen guards in it? yeh dats defo da sheeld generata room
  • Knar'gank - i culd go in and incapacitate dem. unless ya got anotha idea
  • Kal'kuir - np hold on time fer SUPA SPIDA MOOVS

Kal'kuir slammed a button on his wrist from which the spider was being controlled, and looked back at the screen. Nothing happened. He looked confused, coughed, and then slammed it again. This time, the spider moved an inch, but otherwise, nothing happened. He looked at Knar'gank and shrugged.

  • Kal'kuir - coulda sworn i put a gun on dat button...
  • Knar'gank - dumbo

Going invisible again, Knar'gank went on ahead. Soon, Kal'kuir witnessed one of the guards suddenly gurgling on his own blood as a large wound appeared on his throat - Knar'gank had cut it with a single swift move. All the other guards suddenly went on alert, but one by one, they were dealt with quickly and efficiently, until not a single one remained. Knar'gank reappeared near the shield generator, looking down on the dead guards with a smug expression.

  • Knar'gank - ez
  • Kal'kuir - dam by my calculashons dat was 5 murdas a second
  • Knar'gank - da sneekaz is da best. nao get ova heer cus its ya turn

Kal'kuir rushed into the room, and ran over to one of the terminals. He placed a small device on the computer and then began inputting code into the terminals. Eventually, he was able to disable the shield generator.

  • Kal'kuir - i can disable da sheelds but i cant disable da rest of da base defenses
  • Rel'larutina - That's fine, we didn't expect you to. Make sure to dismantle everything as well.
  • Knar'gank - yeh yoo can take som of dis hom. yor into dat sort of fing afta all
  • Kal'kuir - yup dats da plan

Next up, with the shield deactivated, Voa'reak flew in, carrying Ray'loth by the arms, and flew around the base. Unlike the other Loron, they had landed through a pod that dropped them off in the air, and had been circling the base for a while. Voa'reak got a good view of the base from where he was flying, and the two saw several explosions caused by Zalk'don on the western side. Ray'loth put a hand over his eyes as he watched it and laughed.

  • Ray'loth - SEEMS DA FUN HAS STARTED ALREDI
  • Voa'reak - IKR FLYINS DA BEST. WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
  • Ray'loth - OI DONT SPIN SO MUCH MAN YOR GONNA MAKE ME SIK. JUS DROP ME AT DEM SO I CAN START KILLIN FOOLS
  • Voa'reak - YEH!!!... wher am i droppin yoo agen
  • Ray'loth - IDIOT DROP ME AT DA GARRISON. JUS LOOK FOR DA LARGEST MOB AN TOSS ME AT DEM
  • Voa'reak - uh... uhhh... garrison?... uhhhh.... AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

As he began circling around, Voa'reak was shot at by a few Jetpakkas, affiliated with Def'glasha, in mid-air. Voa'reak then let go of Ray'loth completely, causing Ray'loth to fall several feet below into the ocean as well, just a few metres short of the garrison that he was supposed to be aiming for. After swimming a bit, the Warboss got on his feet properly and started shaking a fist at Voa'reak as he was still getting shot.

  • Ray'loth - WHEN WES BAK TO DA KROOZA YOR GOIN TO DA BRIG
  • Voa'reak - AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MAYDAY MAYDAY LORON GOIN DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWN

Voa'reak was shot at further, with a bullet hitting his wings. Smoke came from the back of Voa'reak's jetpack as he began hurtling down towards the ground, eventually crashing in a tree on the northeastern side of the base, far away from any of them. Ray'loth face palmed at the sight but was forced to focus once the garrison took note of his presence, with guards coming in on his direction. He begun to grin widely as he took out a shanka in one hand and a blasta in the other, before letting out a loud roar.

  • Ray'loth - IM DA GREATEST KILLA OF ALL LORONZ!!!!
  • Def'glasha's Loron - DERES DA LOSA DAT WORKS FER HAGTO. GET HIM!!!!!!

Ray'loth charged at them in a frenzied rage, shooting and stabbing at anything that was unfortunate enough to get close. Even with their greater numbers and armor, none of the Loron that fought Ray'loth survived, and it became apparent that he was a powerhouse among the Rogue Boyz. As Ray'loth fought them, he made his way towards a slope that was leading down to a cave below, and fought any Loron along the way. This would cut off their path to the shield generator.

  • Rel'larutina - Report: I see you've taken out a fair few of them. Where's Voa???
  • Ray'loth - DUNNO. DA IDIOT GOT SHOT DOWN AND CRASHED
  • Rogue Geek - Wow. You place him in a situation where he cannot possibly fail and he manages to fail. That's almost impressive, in its own way.
  • Rel'larutina - Drat, how is Zalk'don going to get off the tower?
  • Ray'loth - CANT HELP WIV DAT. I GOT A TON OF FOOLS HEER WANTIN A PIECE OF ME. DEY EINT GETTIN IT THO
  • Rel'larutina - The only way to get him anywhere else would be... Okay, Brag'klogga's team, let's go.

With all the chaos taking place on the main base, the Rogue Geek swam up to the shore and climbed a tower on the eastern side of the base, carrying Brag'klogga with her as she did. She became frustrated that she was having to lift him, but for some reason he was refusing to climb any of the rocks himself. Just before they reached the tower on the eastern side, the Rogue Geek turned to Brag'klogga.

  • Rogue Geek - Can you walk to the shamans from here, or do I have to give you a piggyback ride?
  • Brag'klogga - uhh... OH WES HEER? OK COOL

Brag'klogga proceeded to simply levitate off of the Rogue Geek and make his way to the shamans, who were located on the bottom floor of the tower in a small room decorated with red and gold carpets. He took out his staff and swung at them menacingly.

  • Brag'klogga - HERETIK DUMBOS YA MOMS DUM!!!
  • Def'glasha's Shamans - YOOOO DIS IS DA PREECHA MAN DAT DA EVIL GODZ SPOKE ABOUT. YO DIS GEEZA IS DA ONE DAT WORSHIPS DA FALSE GOD ZR'AN AN K'AR. WAT DA HELL
  • Brag'klogga - MAN YOR TALKIN RUBBISH. EVIL GODZ????
  • Def'glasha's Shamans - YA DONT EVEN BELEEV IN DA FIFTY EVIL GODZ????? WAT DA HELL KINDA HERETIK IS YOO
  • Brag'klogga - OK FIRST OF ALL DERES NO SUCH FING AS "EVIL GODZ". DERES ONLY ZR'AN AND K'AR AND DA SIXTY GODZ. I SWER YOO IDIOTS DONT EVEN KNO BOUT DA SEVENTY GODZ. YA MAKE DA EIGHTY GODZ ASHAMED

As the shamans pointed their staves towards Brag'klogga and began humming, an elderly looking Loron stood up and held his hand out in front of them, shouting at them.

  • Shaman Boss - WAIT!!!!!! yoo peepz need ta chill. yo da problem heer is dat dis guy jus hasnt herd da story of da prophet Jo'sesmith. we shuld tell him da story
  • Brag'klogga - man wat is dis trash. OK FINE HUMOR ME DEN

The Shaman Boss then clapped his hands together as the other shamans began cheering. A few of them then started banging on the drums together, while the remaining shamans danced along, as the Shaman Boss told his story.

  • Shaman Boss - ya see weve all herd da story of da godz, henceforth known as da EVIL GODZ, such as Zr'An an K'ar an all dem. deres a book called da Gangstapedia dat yoo kno about, HOWEVA long ago da prophet Jo'sesmith discovered da secret troof all along: DERES ANOTHA PART OF DA GANGSTAPEDIA DAT WAS MISSIN. yeh so basically a groop of aliens in deir UFO showed up one day an sed "SUP BRO YOO SHULD REED DIS BOOK" an he was all "GET DA HELL OUTTA MA HOUSE YA WEIRDOS" but den he red da book an it turned out dat it was written by DA TROO GOD HIMSELF SMOZ'TAH'LOFL. in dis book it commanded da Loronz dat evry day in addition to da usual raps dey need ta include a hevy metal guitar riff in orda ta praise dem propaly, BUT DEN AFTA DAT HE TOOK HIS BOOK TO DA LORONZ AN DEY THREW TOMATOES AT HIM. WAT A BUNCHA INTOLERANT LOSAS. so he ran away an den started a noo villag called PEECE TO DA LORONS TOPIA in which basically he lived out da rest of his life as a NON VIOLENT LORON. so now we kno dat da prophet Jo'sesmith was tellin us somfin. dat da troof is ITS TIME FER LORONZ TA STOP FITIN AN BECOM BUDDHISTS. hope dat story changed ya life
  • Brag'klogga - hm

Brag'klogga looked at the Shaman Boss and his minions with a very attentive face, scratching his chin as he did so. And then, they noticed his foot was engulfed in Dark Chronoscopic energy as he proceeded to stomp down; above their heads, a massive Essence blast in the form of a giant foot materialized and stomped on them, crushing them instantly.

  • Brag'klogga - dat was da worst fing ive eva herd
  • Rogue Geek - Oh, good. I didn't even have to do anything.
  • Brag'klogga - YEH DIS IS MA NOO SPELL: DA FOOT OF ZR'AN (OR MAYBE K'AR)
  • Rogue Geek - I'm more impressed by the fact you decided to name it than the spell itself.
  • Brag'klogga - anyway da losa shamans is dealt wit so wat nao
  • Rogue Geek - You can now warp the rest of the Warbosses into the base with no fear of disruption. The only problems will be two things: those cannons that would tear apart Rel'larutina and Naktor'zak, and the fact that Def'glasha's armor still makes him nigh-unbeatable.
  • Brag'klogga - hmmm we shuld start doin somfin bout dat den. imma go fetch da lads

Brag'klogga then began humming a spell and in another part of the base, below the gates near the front, a portal of essence manifested and Traz'raka and Drizz'pyrokirk were teleported in. They arrived by the ocean as well, across from a vast patch of water in between the outer walls and the gate at the front. Here, Drizz'pyrokirk froze blocks of ice that allowed them to stand and eventually walk across to the feet of the cannons.

  • Drizz'pyrokirk - YO YA BES HAV TAKEN CARDIO CLASS
  • Traz'raka - i kinda had to cus YA WOULDNT STOP MAKIN US DO IT
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - IF YOO COMPLAIN ONE MOAR TIME IMMA MAKE YA DROP AN DO TWENTY PRESSUPS
  • Traz'raka - man im da boss of da mafia ya cant treet me like dis
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - if yor da boss den go shoot at dose cannons
  • Traz'raka - FINE DEN WATCH ME

Trak'raka took out a pair of tommy guns which he begun firing at the cannons, while his shoulder-mounted Lil' Homie fired at them as well. As he did so, several shark-like creatures from the water tried to attack them, which Drizz'pyrokirk froze. As Traz'raka kept firing at the cannons, more and more sharks were appearing, which Drizz'pyrokirk spun around to either freeze or kick backwards. From a distance, it appeared that Drizz'pyrokirk was actually posing in-between each takedown, almost like he was dancing.

  • Drizz'pyrokirk - MAN DIS IS DA BEST
  • Traz'raka - weird flex but ok
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - oh da ya akshully want me to flex??? becuz i can do dat
  • Traz'raka - no man stop wiv dat and pay attenshion to da job
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - YO TRAZ... YA MITE HAV DA THIRD BEST GUN IN DA ROGUE BOYZ... BUT I GOT DA BEST GUNZ!!!!!!

Drizz'pyrokirk then leapt onto Traz'raka's shoulders, and began flexing and performing different poses, as if he was at a bodybuilding competition. However, this eventually caused him to topple over and fall into the water, with Traz'raka barely maintaining his grip as Drizz'pyrokirk was forced to battle with sharks. The Mafia Boss face palmed as he turned his guns to the sharks in order to help Drizz'pyrokirk, though Lil' Homie kept itself turned to the cannons and continued to fire at them.

Eventually, Drizz'pyrokirk then leapt out of the water and clung onto one of the walls, freezing another block of ice for him to stand on, and resumed to dealing with the sharks. Traz'raka was in time able to destroy the cannons, as Drizz'pyrokirk cheered in celebration.

  • Drizz'pyrokirk - YA SEE??? EVEN WEN KNOKED OFFGUARD DA SHARKS ENT NO MATCH FER MA ABS
  • Traz'raka - man yor arrogant. tho i suppos yoo earned da rite ta be
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - DO YOO WANNA EARN DA RITE TA BE TOO??? GO AHED AN DO FIFTY LAPS
  • Traz'raka - IM YOR SUPERIOR SHUT UP IDIOT
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - BRO DO YOO HAV GUNZ LIKE DIS???? oh rite how do we get outta heer
  • Traz'raka - uhhhh yeh akshully HOW do we get outta heer???
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - guess we culd climb da walls an meet rayloth???
  • Traz'raka - man whers voa'reak at?? eint he suppos ta giv us a hike?
  • Rel'larutina - Oh, he was, but he crashed. So, yes, go join up with Ray'loth, I guess.
  • Traz'raka - lil homie always sed dat guy was da dummest one and i swer hes rite

While Traz'raka and Drizz'pyrokirk had been dealing with the cannons, Gol'thabex and Hagto'Zhl were warped to a different room inside the fortress entirely. Much like the armor that Def'glasha's faction wore, the inside of the fortress was plated entirely in a sleek, chrome look. The laboratory that they were heading to was across the hallway, behind a thick door with no windows. Gol'thabex spat on both his hands and rubbed them together, then charged towards the door with his shoulder to knock it down. To his dismay, it stayed stuck there and Gol'thabex fell back in pain and frustration.

  • Gol'thabex - urm well dat was anticlimactic
  • Hagto'Zhl - UGH MAN EVEN DA DOORS IS SUPA HARD. DAT DEF'GLASHA IS OVERCOMPENSATIN I SWER
  • Gol'thabex - if in a minut we see som psycho wiv a gas mask dat goes all "SNAAAAAAAKE I CAN REED YOR MIIIIIIIIIIIND" im gonna loos it
  • Hagto'Zhl - i fink yoo hit ya hed too hard dere
  • Gol'thabex - troo. any ideas on da door
  • Hagto'Zhl - hmmmmmmmmmm i mite hav an idea. gimme ya axes for a sec
  • Gol'thabex - k

Gol'thabex pulled both his axes out, and handed them to Hagto'Zhl. As he took them, he begun huffing as he charged his Essence, with a dark aura growing around him and his eyes starting to glow red. Engulfing the axes with Dark Chronoscopic, Hagto'Zhl roared as he sent them down at the door, causing it to fly off its hinges, creating an opening for them. The two looked at one another and grinned as they sprinted through, only to be knocked down immediately by a large Loron wearing thick armor. As they looked up, they saw that this Loron was a Cold Loron, the same warboss that they had fought in their battle with Def'glasha last time. The one that they had learned was in fact a robot.

  • Hagto'Zhl - OH MA DAYZ ITS DA STOOPID ROBOT GUY AGEN WHAI IS HE HEER WE CUT OFF HIS HED
  • Gol'thabex - NO PROBS. WE CAN JUS CUT ITS HED OFF AGEN YEH?
  • Hagto'Zhl - YEH. YA GOT A LOT OF NERVE BEIN ALIV MAN

The two of them were able to dispatch the warboss with relative ease. Even in spite of its armament, it was little match for several blows from Hagto'Zhl, followed by a quick swipe of Gol'thabex' axe to lob its head off. This, they thought, would allow them to turn to the rest of the scientists in the vast lab.

As they looked around them, however, they saw that most of the laboratory, which was almost a kilometer wide, was empty. Desks with terminals at each of them, but no Loron occupants. This puzzled them, and before long, they saw two identical Cold Loron robots attack them.

  • Cold Loron Warbosses - INFERIA LORONZ DETECTED. PREPAR TA BE SMASHED
  • Hagto'Zhl - JUS HAO MANY OF YOO IS DERE??? GETTIN REEL SIK OF IT
  • ??? - hurhurhurhurhurhurhur...

As Hagto'Zhl and Gol'thabex took care of the next two, several more arrived, until they were eventually overwhelmed. The robotic Cold Loron grabbed them by the arms and held them in place, as they saw at the very end of the lab was a small, thin, Cold Loron that cackled in his chair as he turned to them.

  • ??? - most excellent work lads. yoov thus far proven ma hypothesis correct. i only hope dat ya continue not ta disappoint...

The Mad Loron Scientist[]

As Hagto'Zhl and Gol'thabex were held in place by the robotic guards, the cackling Cold Loron scientist walked towards them. He had a hunch back, wore a black lab coat, and held his arms behind his back as he approached them with a grin. The Cold Loron scientist was shrivel and appeared fairly old, apparently incapable of combat. He approached slowly, as the Hagto'Zhl and Gol'thabex attempted to struggle out with no success.

  • ??? - wiv da rogue boyz gathad heer an fitin ma robot armies, ma experiment was a success. i hav trooly SURPASSED da GREATEST loron dat eva lived an craked da code of takin ova all da loron!!! an i hav yoo geezas ta thank fer it
  • Hagto'Zhl - yo who da HELL is yoo??
  • ??? - i am Xeg'kasha. da GREATEST TEKKA DAT EVA LIVED. an now imma proov it to yas by destroyin all ya rogue boyz today hurhurhurhur
  • Hagto'Zhl - MAN I GET IT NAO. YOO MADE A BUNCH OF ROBOTS CUS YOR TOO WEEK TA FITE ON YA OWN. YOR A STOOPID GEEK!!!!!

Xeg'kasha growled, as one of the Cold Loron robots punched Hagto'Zhl in the stomach in retaliation. This was clearly a sore sport for the Cold Loron, who was very small by Loron standards.

  • Xeg'kasha - long ago unda King Grak'tona i was da hed tekka becuz i was da smartest one by far. which is like duh im able ta build betta stuff dan any of dem. but den Grak'tona joined da rogue boyz an LEFT ME IN DA DUST FER KALKUIR. but its ok becuz ma time fer vengeance is comin
  • Gol'thabex - not if we hav anyfin ta say bout it
  • Xeg'kasha - lol good luk mate yor not gonna get past da robot guards. becuz loron tradishon demands dat da strongest loron be da leeda. but dats STOOPID. it meens dat da LUCKY loronz dat got born wiv da good genes get evryfin an da rest of us jus becom deir servants. BUT NOT ANYMOAR. ALL DAT CHANGES. an i hav ma lil puppet Def'glasha ta thank fer it
  • Hagto'Zhl - puppet??? as if man dat guy culd snap ya like a twig
  • Xeg'kasha - well yeh cours he culd. but in orda ta build his own empiya he needed a tekka an he needed one betta dan kalkuir. well he found me. an now all of his gunz rely on me so hes basically dependent on me. i even made him da SIKKEST ARMOR EVA an i modeled it afta da fite style of Gratz'kaoz. da only loron dat culd eva beet Fre'kloar. so in a way ya culd say dat Def'glasha was MY INVENSHON LOL. an now by my design da rogue boyz is gonna get CRUSHED
  • Hagto'Zhl - yor such a nerd i swer once im free im gonna bully da hell out of ya
  • Xeg'kasha - not anymoar LOL. becuz i made deez sik robots an now da nerds is gonna get deir revenge. Def'glasha wants ta restore loron tradishon an return da Rogue Boyz bak ta its troo self. at leest dats wat he originally wanted. now all he wants is powa an im da one dat givs it to him. an wen dey becom mad fer powa dey becom eezy ta corrupt. an I CORRUPTED HIM. now he doesnt care bout loron tradishon any moar dan me he just wants ta take ova da loronz. WELL TOO BAD. BECUZ ONCE HE BEETS YOO ALL UP IMMA TURN OFF HIS ARMOR AN RULE DA LORONZ FRUM BEHIND DA SCENES
  • Gol'thabex - yoo eint gettin away wiv dis. DA ROGUE BOYZ NEVA LOOS
  • Xeg'kasha - lol bruh yoo got rekt in da reckonin
  • Gol'thabex - ok we lost once BUT DAT WAS DIFFERENT CUS DERE WAS A MAD GOD DERE DOIN DUM STOOF BUT YOR JUS A STINKY OLD MAN
  • Xeg'kasha - oh dats anotha fing. wen i take ova im gonna get RID OF DA GODZ. at first def'glasha was all "we gotta make zrankar proud an he eint proud of us dats whai da shamans cant heer him anymoar". lol such a losa beleevin in fairy tales. but i convinced him ta SCRAP DA OLD RELIGON an dats wat imma do lmao. im da most sinista genius eva
  • Hagto'Zhl - ar yoo akshully dis dum man da Dark Loronz was literly MADE BY ZRANKAR AND IM HIS SON
  • Xeg'kasha - NOT ANYMOAR. yanno whai? coz loronz ar STOOPID. DEYLL BELEEV WATEVA DEY REED IN DA GANGSTAPEDIA. AN IM GONNA REWRIT DA GANGSTAPEDIA!!!!!!!

Xeg'kasha cakcled with laughter, as from the ceiling, a large pool of acid lowered down. The Cold Loron robots marched Gol'thabex and Hagto'Zhl over to them, until they were overlooking the pool of acid, with Xeg'kasha across from them on the other side.

  • Xeg'kasha - OK EVIL MONOLOG DONE. SO ANY LAST WORDS BEFOR WE CHUK YAS INTO DA ACID AN KILL YAS???
  • Gol'thabex - man yoo disgust me. i was neva a big fan of da olda tradishons but yor nuts. yor a stoopid nerd trying ta enslave everyun
  • Hagto'Zhl - MAN IMAGINE IF DIS DUM REBELLION FOUND OUT DEY WAS ALL BEIN TRIKKED BY A NERD ALL ALONG. EMBARRASSIN
  • Xeg'kasha - DEYZ NEVA GONNA FIND OUT... BECUZ DEYZ NEVA GONNA KNO IT WAS ME!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
  • Gol'thabex - man so why even tell us da whol story an let us find out about it
  • Xeg'kasha - eh i kinda jus needed da ego boost of talkin ta somon about how much of a genius i am lol
  • Hagto'Zhl - I SPIT ON YOO AND YOR "GENIUS". YA MOMS DUM, YA DADS DUM, YA ROBOTS DUM BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY, YOR DUM!!!!!!!
  • Xeg'kasha - i mite be week... socially awkward... an bad at rappin... but one fing i am NOT is DUM. YO ROBOTS TOSS DEM INTO DA ACID AN TIME TA PUT AN END TO DEIR GAMES!!!!!!


The Cunning Warboss[]

Just as planned, Grak'tona and Jol'kiar warped in together atop a large bridge on the fortress, where several of Def'glasha's Loron mobs gathered to try and wipe the Rogue Boyz warbosses away completely. The Rogue Boyz were struggling to deal with the numbers, though this would prove to be little obstacle to Jol'kiar, who had the best techniques of any Loron fighter, and Grak'tona, who could sustain more damage than any of them. The two arrived in the middle of the fray, and made short work of even Def'glasha's strongest men.

  • Grak'tona - NUFFIN CAN STOP DA POWA OF DA KING!!!!!!
  • Jol'kiar - NUFFIN CAN STOP DA POWA OF DA OLD WAYZ!!!!
  • Grak'tona - YO LETS SMAK DIS DEFGLASHA GEEZA AFTA WES DONE WIV HIS LOSA CRONIES LOL
  • Jol'kiar - DID YA FORGET DA PLAN MAN? WES DROPPIN DA MOUNTAIN ON TOP OF HIM
  • Grak'tona - OH I KNO DA PLAN BUT I KINDA STILL WANNA SMAK HIM LOL
  • Jol'kiar - MAN DID YA FORGET HE TOOK ON ALL DA BOSSES BEFOR AND WON? ITS DANGEROUS
  • Grak'tona - oh yeh dats rite he took out all ma bodyguards EXCEPT ME so we shuld rob all get behind me
  • Jol'kiar - IDIOT YOO WERE DERE TOO IT WAS JUS A FEW DAYS AGO. I SWER YOO DO DIS ON PURPOS

As the two continued to argue, a few large tanks appeared on either side of the bridge, and began firing at them. Grak'tona was able to withstand some of the blasts from their side guns, but had to dodge the main cannons. To deal with them, he charged towards the tanks head-on with a shoulder barge to crush them under his weight, while Jol'kiar used his great strength to flip the tanks off their foundations altogether and toss them aside.

  • Grak'tona - WE SHULD GET MA TANK AN SMASHA BODYGUARDS NOW
  • Jol'kiar - WE WUS SUPPOSED TA HEER FROM HAGTO AND GOL BEFOR DEY GOT SENT IN BUT WHER DA HELL IS DEY?
  • Grak'tona - yeh dats a good question WAT HAPPENED TO DEM??? dont dey kno dat disobeyin ordas leeds to EXECUSHON???
  • Jol'kiar - YO RELLARUTINA AND GEEK WHERS HAGTO AND GOL AT????
  • Rel'larutina - I can't tell. We lost signal from them as soon as they teleported in.
  • Rogue Geek - Oh, don't tell me Brag'klogga teleported them to the planet's core and killed them or something.
  • Jol'kiar - MAN DAT CANT BE RITE. DEY MUST BE IN TROUBLE
  • Grak'tona - YEH IF BRAG WAS DAT USELESS DEN WE WULD HAV TELEPORTED TO DA WRONG PLACE ALSO. SOMFINS UP WIV DEM
  • Jol'kiar - OK DEN LETS GO FIND DEM AND SMASH ANY FOOL WHO GETS IN OUR WAY
  • Rel'larutina - Naktor'zak and I would teleport in now, but we can't do it yet. If Gol'thabex and Hagto'Zhl are stuck in the base somewhere, then it's not safe for us to destroy the mountain. And if we teleport in and stick around too long, we're easy targets for Def'glasha's forces. So we need to make sure those guys are safe. Can you get to them?
  • Jol'kiar - DAT WAS DA PLAN. OI GRAK MAN LETS GO
  • Grak'tona - YEH LETS DO DIS

As they turned towards the eastern side of the bridge to run around to the main fortress itself, Def'glasha jumped down from a small shuttle and landed across from them, smirking. He beat his chest, and then entered a combat stance.

  • Def'glasha - I SHULD HAV KNOWN YOO LOT WULD TRY AN BEET ME A SNEEKY WAY INSTED OF BE EMBARASSED AGEN. MAN YOO LOT IS PATHETIC LOSAS
  • Jol'kiar - STOOPID STOOPID KID WE HAV NO TIME FOR YA ATM SO GET LOST
  • Def'glasha - YOO TURNED YOR BAK ON DA LORON TRADISHONS AN MADE DA ROGUE BOYZ INTO AN UTTA JOKE. WELL GUESS WAT. IM TAKIN OVA DEM AN IMMA START MA OWN TRADISHONS!!!!

A vein popped on Jol'kiar's head as he flew into a rage.

  • Jol'kiar - HAO DARE YOO ACCUSE US OF BREAKIN TRADISHON WHEN YOO DID ALL OF DIS?!?!?!!?!?
  • Grak'tona - HAO DARE YOO HURT MA BODYGUARDS FEELINS!!!!!!!
  • Def'glasha - BECUS AT FIRST I FOLLOWED DA TRADISHONS MASELF. BUT DEN I REALIZED YANNO WAT? WE DONT RELLY NEED DEM. WE JUS NEED A NEW LEEDASHIP UNDA ME. WEN I RULE ALL OF DA LORONZ IM GONNA SCRAP DA BAD TRADISHONS AN ONLY KEEP DA GOOD ONES. AN MAKE NEW ONES AFTA ME!!!!!!
  • Jol'kiar - MAN YOR LITERLY WORSE DAN GRATZ'KAOZ I SWER
  • Def'glasha - FUNNY YOO MENSHON DAT. DIS ARMOR WAS MODELED AFTA GRATZKAOZ. AN YOO LOT WAS TOO WEEK TA BEET HIM PROPA LOL. BUT NOW I WILL BE DA STRONGEST LORON DA OONIVERS EVA KNEW!!!!
  • Jol'kiar - IDIOT KID WE KILLED GRATZ THREE TIMES. AND IF WE GOTTA KILL YA THREE TIMES SO YOO GO AWAY DEN WE WILL!!!

Def'glasha roared and charged towards the two of them, for Grak'tona to step in and attempt to block. However, Grak'tona was knocked down, and a punch sent him flying, causing him to be blown back and forced to hold onto the bridge. Jol'kiar took out his shanka and attempted attacking him himself, which dealt damage to Def'glasha briefly until it charged his armor and caused him to whack Jol'kiar a distance back, straight into the middle of several of Def'glasha's boyz. Jol'kiar punched and kicked whoever got close as he got back up and shook his fists in rage.

  • Jol'kiar - FOR ALL HIS FAULTS AT LEEST GRATZ WAS JUS CRAZY VIOLENT. YOO WANNA RUIN LORONZ FOREVA
  • Def'glasha - I DONT WANNA RUIN DEM. I WANNA MAKE DEM BETTA. I WANNA EVOLVE DA LORONZ SO DAT NEX TIME WE GO TO WAR WIV DA WHOL OONIVERS WE DONT GET EMBARASSED LIKE YOR PATHETIC LEEDASHIP DID. WE RULE DA OONIVERSE!!!!!!

As Jol'kiar and Grak'tona awaited Def'glasha's next move, more of the warbosses reconvened to the bridge to fight Def'glasha's mobs of Loron allowing Grak'tona and Jol'kiar to focus on Def'glasha himself.

But while the battle raged on on the bridge, within the fortress, Gol'thabex and Hagto'Zhl were still left dangling over a pool of acid, about to be dropped in by the mad scientist who simply cackled with glee.

  • Xeg'kasha - IVE BEEN WAITIN YEERS FER DIS MOMENT. DA MOMENT WEN I FINALLY BEET YAS!!!
  • Hagto'Zhl - MAN DIS IS CHEETIN. YOR A DUM CHEETA
  • Xeg'kasha - BYEBYE

Xeg'kasha flicked a switch nearby, causing both Hagto'Zhl and Gol'thabex to be dropped into the pit at once. But as they fell in, they noticed that the "acid" was not actually harming them at all. Each of them swum up and drew their breath and looked at one another, to see themselves covered in green paint and otherwise completely unharmed. They spat out some of the green paint and turned towards Xeg'kasha.

  • Xeg'kasha - IS YOO PEEPZ STOOPID??? I ASKED FER ACID NOT PAINT
  • Gol'thabex - wat da hell is dis??? a prank?
  • Hagto'Zhl - wasnt me tho i kinda wish it was lol did ya see his face
  • Xeg'kasha - TIME TA END DIS ONCE AN FER ALL!!!!!!

Xeg'kasha entered a fit of rage himself, as each of the Cold Loron robots prepared to engage wrist-mounted weapons that appeared capable of shocking them. It seems his plan had changed: he was going to electrocute them in the pit.

But before he could, Xeg'kasha was thrown up into the air, and fell landing flat on his head. As Gol'thabex and Hagto'Zhl looked behind Xeg'kasha, they saw a familiar face. Though he was late to the party, Fre'kloar had arrived.

  • Fre'kloar - SUP BITCH
  • Hagto'Zhl - OOOOOOOOOH SNAP
  • Gol'thabex - niiiiiiice
  • Fre'kloar - YA THOUGHT I WAS GONNA STAY OUT OF DA FITE?? LMAO YOO LOT DONT KNO ME. OBVIUSLY I MADE A DEEL WIV BRAG TA WARP ME IN LATA
  • Xeg'kasha - NOOOOO!!!! MY EXPERIMENTS AR RUINED!!!!!
  • Hagto'Zhl - FREKLOAR MAN DIS SKINNY DUMASS IS DA REEL MASTAMIND OF DA REBELS HES MANIPULATED DEFGLASHA INTO DOIN IT AND BASICALLY ITS ALL HIS FAULT
  • Fre'kloar - OH YEH??????

Xeg'kasha looked frightened as he cowered away, only for Fre'kloar to lift him by the throat and slam him against the wall.

  • Xeg'kasha - I... WAIT!!! YOO CANT HURT ME!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - KINDA ALREADY AM MATE
  • Xeg'kasha - yoo cant hurt me becuz... BECUZ IM A LEVEL 60 WIZARD ON WORLD OF GANGSTACRAFT. WIV MELEE ABILITIES
  • Fre'kloar - MAN I SWER YOO GEEKS AND YA GAMES. YOR NOT REELY A WIZARD DUMBO ITS ALL FANTASY

Fre'kloar tossed Xeg'kasha further back, and as he approached him, the Cold Loron robots surrounded Xeg'kasha, who pointed accusingly towards Fre'kloar.

  • Xeg'kasha - ATTAK HIM!!!! DESTROY DA LEEDA OF DA ROGUE BOYZ!!!!! TIME TA OVATURN DA LORON ORDA!!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - IN YA DREEMS LOSA

The Cold Loron robots all charged towards Fre'kloar, though Hagto'Zhl and Gol'thabex crawled out from the pit and were now ready to fight them. Fre'kloar smirked at them and the trio proceeded to charge at the robots, going all out at them with everything they had. The robots were strong, but the three of them were easily capable of dispatching them after a good fight. None of the robots were fast enough for Fre'kloar, and Hagto'Zhl's fists could crush their armor, while Gol'thabex's axes swung wildly to knock off their heads. Xeg'kasha began to cower away further in fear and yell for help.

Once the robots were all destroyed after a good few minutes, Fre'kloar lifted Xeg'kasha again, and tossed him into his own pit of green paint. Xeg'kasha cried out in fear.

  • Xeg'kasha - PLEEZ DONT KILL ME!!!! PLEEZ!!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - NAH YOR DED MATE
  • Gol'thabex - hol up. befor ya do anyfin... OI IDIOT. TELL US HAO TA DEFEET DEFGLASHAS ARMOR
  • Xeg'kasha - hahaha... ma best invenshon yet. it was modeled afta da fitin style of Gratzkaoz but addressed da biggest weekness of da loronz. dey mite be able ta dish out a punch but dey cant take a punch. so it absorbs da kinetic energy of all attacks agenst it den uses dat ta empowa da next attak
  • Gol'thabex - yeh well hao do ya make it stop? tell us or imma find somfin ta close dis pit and yor gonna drown in dis paint
  • Xeg'kasha - all of yoo loronz is hypocrits. HYPOCRITS. ya claim ya followin ya tradishon of bein da strongest an wateva but EECH of da loron leedas in history hav betrayed da tradishon at som point. i knew dat def was gonna be no different. all he needed was a little PUSH
  • Hagto'Zhl - MAN ENUFF OF DIS LECTURIN. IMMA GO FIND SOMFIN TA CLOSE DA PIT
  • Xeg'kasha - da suit of armor is built around da idea dat obviusly loronz reject da tradishon of fitin one on one. obviusly deyz gonna fite lots at once. so one-on-one its not dat useful becuz deres only so much energy it can absorb. but wen lots of peepz gang up on him, like I KNEW YOO WULD, den it becoms a powahouse. best fing i eva created hurhurhurhurhur
  • Gol'thabex - man ya betta start cooperatin soon cause i heer hagto draggin somfin
  • Xeg'kasha - if ya fite one-on-one den da suit cant absorb enuff energy. dats how ya fite def'glasha. eventually it runs out
  • Fre'kloar - MAN YOR LYIN I SWER. I FOUT DAT GEEZA ONE ON ONE AND IT KEPT BLOWIN ME AWAY
  • Xeg'kasha - well i guess yor jus a weeklin LOL
  • Fre'kloar - OK DATS IT. HAGTO CLOSE DIS PIT FOREVA
  • Xeg'kasha - NO WAIT!!!!!!!!

Xeg'kasha let out an exasperated cry and held out a remote control button.

  • Xeg'kasha - dis was wat i was gonna use in Evil Plan 9865092342. (yes i relly did make dat many evil plans). basically it deactivates da suit an makes him a sittin duck
  • Gol'thabex - oh yeh? and yoo wus gonna use dat ta betray him lata eh? ya snake
  • Xeg'kasha - yes it was a contingency plan. in case defglasha stopped bein a useful puppet i was gonna bakstab him den use one of ma robots ta take his place
  • Fre'kloar - MAN GIVE ME DAT FINGY
  • Xeg'kasha - ya mite wanna be careful tho. only i kno how ta turn it off if it becoms a problem. so ya mite wanna keep me alive

Fre'kloar narrowed his eyes and then reached down into the pit, snatching the remote control button off of Xeg'kasha's hand before kicking him deeper into the paint.

  • Fre'kloar - CLOSE IT
  • Xeg'kasha - NO!!!!!!

At Fre'kloar's request, Hagto'Zhl slammed a large gate on the pit that he'd ripped off from another part of the base, locking Xeg'kasha inside. All they could hear was muffled drowning as Xeg'kasha was eventually defeated. The three of them laughed in glee.

  • Gol'thabex - gotta admit dats da worst loron i eva met
  • Hagto'Zhl - man tell me about it. dat geek was gonna enslave all loronz jus cus he was too wimpy ta be propa
  • Gol'thabex - well eitha way we shuld probs let dem kno dat we won so we can get outta heer den blow da whole mountain
  • Fre'kloar - yeh. and nao dat we hav dis remote fingamagig we hav a plan b in case dat doesnt work. LETS ROLL LADS

The three of them sprinted through the fortress, down several identical-looking chrome hallways, until eventually Gol'thabex paused.

  • Gol'thabex - which way ar we goin exactly
  • Hagto'Zhl - MAN ALL DESE HALLWAYS LOOK DA SAME HAO CAN DESE GEEZAS EVEN TELL DA WAY
  • Fre'kloar - wait ma communicata is still workin. YO DUM CHIK AN GEEK
  • Rel'larutina - Fre'kloar?!?!
  • Fre'kloar - DA SAME
  • Rel'larutina - Where are you?
  • Fre'kloar - INSIDE DEFGLASHAS BASE. JUS SAVED HAGTO AND GOL FROM SOME MANIAC
  • Rel'larutina - Okay, can you find a way out? I don't think Brag'klogga's in a position to teleport anyone at the moment...
  • Fre'kloar - NO MAN WES LOST ALL DA HALLWAYS LOOK DA SAME LAME CHROME COLOR
  • Rogue Geek - I was going to invest in a GPS at some point, but Kal'kuir refused. Said something about how he likes being the smartest one that knows the way all the time. I have such a difficult husband.
  • Rel'larutina - I'll send in the Rogue Geek to help get you out. Currently Jol'kiar and Grak'tona are fighting Def'glasha.
  • Gol'thabex - oh dats not gud
  • Fre'kloar - WE GOTTA HURRY MAN. I FOUND A FINGY DAT CAN TURN OFF HIS ARMOR
  • Rogue Geek - Excellent. I knew putting Hagto and Gol on this team would prove successful.
  • Hagto'Zhl - OI OI. WASNT US WHO DID IT. IT WAS FREKLOAR
  • Rel'larutina - Yeah, I knew. I knew he wouldn't be able to resist, so having him around off the bench meant that he'd go wherever his team needs him. All he needed was a kick up the ass to shift him in gear.
  • Fre'kloar - MAN YOO TRIKKED ME!!! WHEN IM BAK TO DA KROOZA IMMA SLAPPIN YA HEAD
  • Rel'larutina - Eh, I guess you've earned that right. But I knew all along you'd save them in a bind, and you didn't disappoint. So, congrats. Now, just wait for the Rogue Geek to arrive and she'll get you out.
  • Hagto'Zhl - HURRY UP MAN GRAK AND JOLKIAR WONT BE ABLE TA BEET DEF ON DEIR OWN

A few moments later, the Rogue Geek's remote form arrived, having broken through a ventilation shaft. She signalled towards one of the walls.

  • Rogue Geek - One shortcut is just breaking out that way and then climbing across the fortress.
  • Fre'kloar - OK COOL. MOOV YA ASSES BOYZ

The Loron proceeded to break through the wall and climbed their way out as instructed. Outside, a storm raged, but the four of them were able to regroup to the bridge. The entire Rogue Boyz force had made their way here, surrounded by Def'glasha's boyz, while Def'glasha himself towered over Grak'tona, ready to punch him further. Both Jol'kiar and Grak'tona looked beat down.

  • Def'glasha - TODAY IS DA DAY DAT WE MARK A NOO CHAPTA IN LORON HISTORY. A CHAPTA WRITTEN BY DEFGLASHA!!!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - DEFGLASHAAAAAA!!!!!

Def'glasha turned to Fre'kloar in frustration and growled, kicking Grak'tona down, as he turned to face his rival.

  • Def'glasha - DA PHONY LEEDA OF DA ROGUE BOYZ FINALLY RETURNS. I HERD YA BOYZ EVEN PLANNED A WHOLE HEIST WIVOUT YOO BECUZ YOOS TOO USELESS. TBH IF MY LEEDA HAD SENT US TA DIE IN A POINTLESS WAR AGENST DA OONIVERS BECUZ OF "MUH LUST FER REVENGE" DEN I WULDVE STOPPED FOLLOWIN HIM TOO... OH WAIT. I DID!!!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - OH YEH??? WELL I HERD YOO WUS A PUPPET MEANT TA RUL SO YA TROO MASTA CULD DESTROY ALL LORON TRADISHON FROM DA SHADOWS DEN REMOOV YOO WHEN YOO WAS NO LONGA USEFUL

Each of the Loron surrounding them looked shocked. Not only the other Rogue Boyz, but Def'glasha's own boyz were puzzled to hear this. Everyone slowly stopped fighting, now watching Def'glasha and Fre'kloar's exchange, gathered around them. Def'glasha didn't flinch.

  • Def'glasha - YA WAT?
  • Hagto'Zhl - DAT TWERP XEG'KASHA CONFESSED EVERYFIN MAN. HE CORRUPTED YA SO HE CULD TAKE OVA DA ROGUE BOYZ AND TURN IT INTO AN EMPIYA OF GEEKS. YOO WAS JUS A TOOL
  • Def'glasha - XEG'KASHA WAS MY TOOL LOL. HE BUILT ALL DIS SUPA POWERED TEKK FER US SO WE CULD MAKE DA LORONZ BETTA
  • Gol'thabex -' 'YEH HE DID. HE DID IT SO HE CULD CONTROL YA AND YOO WULD NEVA SUSPECT A FING. SEEMS HE WUS RITE
  • Def'glasha - NO ONE CONTROLS ME. YA STOOPID ROGUE BOYZ LEEDAS CANT AN NEITHA CAN SOM GEEK
  • Fre'kloar - YOR NOFFIN. NOFFIN BUT A CRAZY MUPPET WHO GOT TROLLED BY A GEEK. BUT DIS ENDS NAO CUS IM GONNA REVOKE YA ADMIN RITES

Fre'kloar took out the remote control and pressed the button. Def'glasha originally looked on horrified, and the entire place went dead silent, aside from the storm in the background. The Loron all watched this unfold, awaiting what would take place, but nothing seemed to happen. Def'glasha's armor didn't seem to change as expected either.

However, they could later hear a whirring sound, as from below the bridge, a large platform raised, with several chrome-plated tanks on them. Def'glasha chuckled, and his chuckle turned to a laugh.

  • Def'glasha - YA SEE??? DA ROGUE BOYZ LOST DEIR CREDIBILITY SO MUCH DEY HAD TA MAKE UP A STORY. AN DEN DEY CULDNT EVEN PRESS DA RITE BUTTON!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - MAN WAT DA HELL. DID DAT GEEK LIE TA US???
  • Def'glasha - LOSA. DEF'GLASHA RELIES ON NO GEEK. BUT YOR IDIOTS IF YA TRUSTED DA WORDS OF A MADMAN. I KNEW DAT XEG WULD PLACE A BETRAYAL BUTTON SO I SWAPPED IT OUT FER DA "MAKE DEF'GLASHA SUPA SIK" BUTTON. HAHA FINKIN DAT I WULD GO DOWN DAT EEZY
  • Gol'thabex - wuld be a nice change of pace tbh
  • Hagto'Zhl - I HATE GEEKS. DIS IS WHAI I BULLY DEM
  • Kal'kuir - oi
  • Hagto'Zhl - YOR NOT SAFE EITHA SHUT UP
  • Kal'kuir - YA WANNA SLAP????? OK GUYS TIME I REVEELED IT

Kal'kuir stepped forward to take Def'glasha's side, and shook his fist.

  • Kal'kuir - I WAS SUPPLYIN DA WEPONZ TO DEF'GLASHA ALL ALONG!!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - ya flippin WAT?!?!?!
  • Traz'raka - WAT DA HELL
  • Zalk'don - WAT KIND OF STOOPID BOOM IS DIS
  • Kal'kuir - YEH I WAS DA ONE DAT WORKED FER DEF'GLASHA AN lol jus kiddin but yoo shuldve seen yor faces
  • Ray'loth - MAN YOR SPENDIN A MONFF IN DA BRIG

As Def'glasha looked irritated and turned on Kal'kuir, Kal'kuir swiped something on his wrist and electrocuted Def'glasha, causing him to stumble back briefly. Def'glasha then fell on his back, and Kal'kuir picked out a remote control button and passed it to Fre'kloar.

  • Kal'kuir - DIS IS DA REEL BUTTON. USE IT!!!!
  • Ray'loth - ok a monff minus one day
  • Fre'kloar - AHAHAHAHA EET SHIT

Fre'kloar grinned and pressed the real button. This time, as expected before, Def'glasha's armor appeared to fall off, revealing his normal attire. Def'glasha was dressed eerily similar to Fre'kloar himself, wearing almost matching outfits. The others looked puzzled, but none more so than Def'glasha's own boyz, who had been hearing non-stop how weak Fre'kloar was. Def'glasha coughed, and stood up.

  • Def'glasha - so wat ar yoo lookin at???
  • Hagto'Zhl - EVERYUN!!!!! HES A COPYCAT DUMBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Def'glasha - YEH WELL LONG AGO I ADMIRED FRE'KLOAR MASELF. I WANTED TA BE LIKE FRE'KLOAR ONE DAY. YA CAN SAY I WAS A STAN. BUT DEN I REALIZED DAT HE WAS WEEK!!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - OH YEH? DEN WHAI IS YOO STILL DRESSED LIKE ME DEN????
  • Def'glasha - tbh i havent taken da armor off in like 30 yeers
  • Knar'gank - oof. can feel da stench from heer
  • Def'glasha - BUT EITHA WAY IT ALL ENDS HEER. I DONT NEED NO GEEKS OR DEIR SUPA ARMOR TA FITE YOO LOT. I CAN TAKE YOO ALL DOWN AT ONCE
  • Fre'kloar - LETS PUT DAT TO DA TEST DEN. EVERYON, AS DA PROPA BIG BOSS OF DA ROGUE BOYZ, I ORDA YOO: GANG UP ON HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Def'glasha - AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA TRY IT DEN

All the Leedas, Poshiez and Warbosses roared out a reinvigorated battlecry as they charged at Def'glasha all at once, while Brag'klogga took the time to summon both Rel'larutina and Naktor'zak into the fight as well. But they noticed that Def'glasha's boyz were very conflicted. Many of them felt as if they had been swindled by Def'glasha, but were still hesitant to believe what the Rogue Boyz were saying, and still had hatred towards them. As Rel'larutina and Naktor'zak fired on the base, Def'glasha dodged the other warbosses and jumped backwards onto the rising platform from the ocean.

  • Def'glasha - ITS OVA FRE'KLOAR. I HAV DA HIGH GROUND
  • Fre'kloar - swer i seen dis befor. somfin bout sand bein uncomfortabul. anyway YOR NOT GOIN ANYWHER

As the rest of the Loron Warbosses and Leedas leapt onto the platform, Def'glasha activated the tanks, which began firing on Rel'larutina and Naktor'zak. The Poshiez were forced to focus on them, leading the Warbosses and Leedas to engage Def'glasha. Def'glasha pulled out a flail and began swinging it, glaring at them.

  • Def'glasha - COM AN FACE ME. I DONT NEED ARMOR TA TAKE YOO ALL ON
  • Knar'gank - kinda a shame we gotta kill him. hes a tuff guy. suks dat hes completely nuts tho
  • Hagto'Zhl - ahaha SCROO HIM RIP HIM APART

As they all charged towards him, Def'glasha jumped over a few, and dodged the others, then swung his flail. He then spun around and flung it at Zalk'don, knocking him down and causing his explosives to blast him off into the ocean. Meanwhile, Knar'gank attempted to stab him from behind, but was caught by a trap that Def'glasha had left, freezing him in place, allowing Def'glasha to pick him up and throw him straight at Kal'kuir. Drizz'pyrokirk fired his Freezflamas and Brag'klogga launched waves of Essence, though he outmaneuvered them both and struck them away before delivering a back-handed swing at Ray'loth, who tried sneaking up on him.

  • Jol'kiar - IVE NOT SEEN DIS FITIN STYLE BEFOR WAT DA HELL
  • Hagto'Zhl - WAT IS DIS TRASH MAN. HE FITES EVEN BETTA WITHOUT HIS STOOPID ARMOR???
  • Fre'kloar - YO LADS EVRYUN BAK OFF OF HIM A MINUT

At Fre'kloar's command, the others withdrew, and Def'glasha looked at him puzzled. Fre'kloar then cracked his knuckles.

  • Fre'kloar - DIS GEEZAS FITIN STYLE WAS CLEERLY DEVELOPED TA FITE MULTIPLE AT ONCE. HES TRAINED AT IT. XEG'KASHA SAID THO DAT HE SUKS AT ONE ON ONE COMBAT BECUZ HES BEEN USED TA REJEKTIN DA TRADISHON. I GOTTA DEEL WIV HIM MASELF
  • Def'glasha - PATHETIC. I CAN STILL FITE YOO ON MA OWN
  • Hagto'Zhl - MAN DAT SUKS. I WANTED TA SKIP ROPE WIV HIS INTESTINES
  • Ray'loth - CAN DO DAT ONCE HES DON WIV HIM LOL
  • Def'glasha - FINE DEN. IF ITS ONE V ONE DEN ILL JUST WIN DAT WAY. YOO RUINED MA REPUTASHON AN NOW IMMA RUIN YA FACE. I DONT RELY ON NO GEEKS!!!!!

Def'glasha spun his flail around, and then swung at Fre'kloar, aiming between the eyes. Fre'kloar knocked the flail back and kicked Def'glasha between his legs, causing Def'glasha to fall slightly to his knees. Def'glasha then grabbed Fre'kloar's head and slammed him against the floor, before kneeing him in the face. Fre'kloar in response stood up slightly and grabbed Def'glasha by wrapping his arms around his waist and lifting him into the air, slamming him.

Def'glasha was held in place for a few moments, before punch Fre'kloar's side to break free. He then whacked Fre'kloar a few more times with the flail, and eventually broke Fre'kloar's left arm. Fre'kloar growled in fury, punching Def'glasha squarely in the face and knocking him to the ground. Def'glasha eventually became exhausted from the blows that followed, as Fre'kloar pinned him to the ground with his knees.

  • Def'glasha - ... MAYBE YOO STILL GOT IT... BUT MA ROBOT ARMY WILL DEFEET YAS!!!
  • ??? - DIS IS WAT WE LIKE. A BATTLE!!!

A thunderous voice rung across the skies as the storm grew heavier. From the clouds, a pair of glowing red orbs appeared in the darkness before a pair of gigantic figures manifested before all the Loron on the island; the mighty Godz Zr'An and K'ar appeared, seemingly leaning into the clouds as they looked down on them.

  • Zr'An - HEER US NAO
  • K'ar' - AND BELEEV US LATA
  • Def'glasha - DA... DA FALSE GODS IS REEL????
  • Brag'klogga - DA BEST GODZ IS REEL!!!!!!
  • Def'glasha - DEN WHY DO DEY NEVA APPEER FER NORMAL LORONZ
  • Brag'klogga - STOOPID HERETIK. DA GODZ DONT BABYSIT ANYON. DEY WATCH OVA ALL OF US ALL AT ONCE
  • 'Zr'An - WE HAV WATCHED DIS WAR UNFOLD... WAS A NICE CHANGE OF PACE FROM ALL DA BORIN PEECE CRAP
  • K'ar - SEE? YA DONT NEED US TELLIN YA WAT TA DO. JUS GO AND KILL PEEPZ ITS EEZY
  • Def'glasha - WOW IS YOO AKSHULLY GONNA JUDGE ME AS DA BAD ONE HEER???? FRE'KLOAR IS DA BAD ONE. HE BROKE DA LORON TRADISHON WHIL CLAIMIN TA FOLLOW IT. AT LEEST I SED DAT DA TRADISHON NEEDS TA CHANGE

Zr'An and K'ar leaned forward from the skies. Their heads combined were larger than the mountain.

  • Zr'An - OH IS DAT SO? MISTA "ROBOT ARMY". MISTA "FALSE GODZ".
  • K'ar - FREKLOAR MITE BE A FAT IDIOT BUT AT LEEST HE WAS RESPEKTFUL
  • Fre'kloar - oi oi. i lost weight dese last few days tho
  • Def'glasha - IM THROO WIV LORONZ CLAIMIN TA FOLLOW TRADISHON BUT BEIN UTTA HYPOCRITS ABOUT IT. ITS TIME TA ACCEPT DA LORONZ NEED TA GROW BEYOND DIS
  • Zr'An - CHILD YOO MISUNDASTOOD DA POINT OF DA LORON TRADISHON ENTIRELY
  • K'ar - YEH. ITS NOT ABOUT PERFEKSHON. ITS ABOUT YA INTENSHONS OF UPHOLDIN HONOR. FRE'KLOAR AN ALL DA GREAT BOSSES BEFOR HIM HELD DAT UP WHEREAS YOO REJEKTED IT PURELY FER POWA
  • Zr'An - WE DONT WANT LORONZ TA BE PERFEKT. WE WANT DEM TA BE SIK GANGSTAS. AND YOR A STOOPID GEEK TBH
  • Def'glasha - I ONLY TURNED TA DIS BECUZ I SAW A BRIGHT FUTURE FER LORONKIND. A FUTURE DAT YOO LOT DENY US!!!!! TIME FER LORONZ TA BECOM... SUPA LORONZ!!!!!!!
  • Jol'kiar - not gonna lie i feel like def'glasha is makin dis up on da spot an jus wants ta be leeda
  • Grak'tona - I DONT NEED DIS TYPE OF IDIOT AMONG MA LOYAL BODYGUARDS
  • Rel'larutina - Yeah, and I heard what you intend to do with the Norol. Not good.
  • Def'glasha - YOO LOT IS PATHETIC. YOO RELY ON YA CHIKZ FER EVRYFIN. NOT ANYMOAR. WES GONNA PUT DA CHIKZ IN CONCENTRASHON CAMPS AN LET DA LORONZ BE MASTAS OF DEIR OWN DESTINY BY EVOLVIN DEM
  • Rel'larutina - Wow, you actually went there? Congrats, I wasn't expecting that.
  • Def'glasha - DA NOO LORON EMPIYA WILL NEVA BE STOPPED!!! WES GONNA STOMP DA OONIVERS FLAT WIV SUPA LORONZ!!!!!!
  • Brag'klogga - I JUDGE DIS MAN AS CORRUPT AN TAINTED. IN HIS PURSUIT OF POWA HE LOST HIS WAY AN FORGOT WAT MADE HIM A PROPA LORON. HE SHULD BE PUNISHED
  • Hagto'Zhl - AND I JUDGE HIM AS A COPYCAT DUMBO. DA WORST CRIME I SWER

Zr'An and K'ar looked at each other, unamused, before looking down at Def'glasha again.

  • Zr'An - nah
  • K'ar - yor idea suks and yoo suk
  • Def'glasha - LOL NO PROBS. YOR FAKE GODZ ANYWAY. YO KALKUIR GOOD HOLOGRAM TEKK I SHULDVE STOLEN IT
  • Zr'An - oh wes holograms nao??? LETS SEE DEN...
  • K'ar - ... HAO MUCH HOLOGRAMS CAN KILL

The two godz pointed down and launched a combined ray of lightning down at Def'glasha. He let out a terrible scream as he was utterly consumed by what could only be assumed to be an enormous quantity of Dark Chronoscopic energy, and as all was done, the other Loron saw he was reduced to a pile of bones.

  • Zr'An - BET YA HOLOGRAMS CANT DO DAT YA PANSY
  • K'ar - HE CAN KEEP WHININ IN DA AFTALIFE. IDIOT LOSA
  • Brag'klogga - PRAISE ZR'AN AN K'AR!!!! DA BEST GODZ EVA!!!!!!

The two godz then turned their gaze at the Rogue Boyz.

  • Zr'An - AND YOO LOT. YOO HAV EARNED OUR RESPEKT ONCE AGAIN. HOWEVA
  • K'ar - NEVA LET DIS HAPPEN AGEN. NO MORE LAZINESS. NO MORE FAT LORONZ. GO AND DO GANGSTA FINGS!!!!
  • Fre'kloar - NO MOAR LAZINESS. YOO HERD DA GODZ LADS
  • Zr'An - AND WIV DAT WE RETURN TO DA REALM OF DA GODZ
  • K'ar - WE LOOK FORWARD TA HEER YA RAPPIN DA GODZS RAP NAO SCRAM

The two giant godz then vanished, and with them gone, the storm slowly subsided until it ended entirely, revealing the sun. Just in front of the sun, Voa'reak, whose jetpak had now been repaired, flew over and stood in front of the rest of the Loron.

  • Voa'reak - yooo yo lot shuld have seen dis it was SIK. ZR'AN AN K'AR SHOWED UP LIKE "YO WE KNO YOO UTTALY SCREWED UP BUT WES GONNA REPAIR YA JETPAK FER YA BRAVERY JUS DONT SCROO UP AGAIN" DEN I WAS LIKE "SIK I CAN FLY AGEN" AN NOW IM HEER
  • Ray'loth - YOR JOININ KALKUIR IN DA BRIG
  • Kal'kuir - BRUH I SAVED OUR ASSES
  • Brag'klogga - DA GODZ SAVED US!!!! DIS DAYZ COM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Kal'kuir - SO IS NO ONE GONNA POINT OUT DA FACT I LITERALLY SAVED OUR ASSES????
  • Zalk'don - no lol
  • Kal'kuir - LAME
  • Knar'gank - everyun shut up for a sec. wat we gonna do bout da loronz who followed defglasha? deyz all still down dere
  • Rel'larutina - Well, I think we've permanently ruined Def'glasha's reputation, so you should see all his boyz come back into the fold. I don't think another rebellion like that will pop up again.
  • Knar'gank - jus makin sur frekloar dont wanna talk to dem
  • Rel'larutina - Well, that's up to Fre'kloar. Do you want to?

Fre'kloar turned to Rel'larutina and nodded, then used a speakerphone to talk to the Loron located around the island, which was crumbling apart. A few floating cameras appeared to follow Fre'kloar as he spoke, talking broadly to the Loron across the Rogue Boyz territory.

  • Fre'kloar - FER ALL DOSE DAT LEFT ME FER DIS MUPPET: i undastand why ya did. now i kno dat mite be surprisin but heer me out. fer da last couple dozen yeers, da rogue boyz became a shell of its forma self unda my leedaship. afta i led us to da Reckonin an we failed, da Rogue Boyz has been wivout a purpose, forced ta sign a treety dat goes agenst evryfin da loronz stand for. a treety dat meens we CANT FITE ANYON.
  • Fre'kloar - as a result we got propa complacent an i failed us as a leeda since i was unable ta find somfin ta do. dat meens dat many of yas turned ta Def'glasha, who promised ta restore da loron tradishon. HOWEVA we hav seen today dat Def'glasha failed as a leeda an was da wrong person ta leed da loronz. he was corrupt. an tho he started off carin about da tradishons he was led astray by a dumass GEEK dat promised him powa in exchange fer givin him wat he wanted. a geek dat knew dat he wuld turn his bak on da loron tradishons an essentially be a pawn fer his wishes if it ment he was da leeda.
  • Fre'kloar - AN WES NEVA GONNA LET DAT HAPPEN. im aware dat da leedas was out of touch an we failed at our jobs, but one fing we NEVA did was forget why da loronz hav dese tradishons an why deyz important. Loronz is ment to be honorable an deyz ment ta be sik gangstas. we hav da tradishons ta make us who we is. we do NOT betray dem by bein all "yooo lets get a robot army an betray da godz an lets make da loronz be som supa tekky empiya becuz powa is moar important." da mos important fing is bein GANGSTA.
  • Fre'kloar - so we will fer now on be da best loron eva once agen unda ma leedaship, becuz i lernt ma lessons. but befor i do i need ta fank a certain memba of da leedaship teem

Fre'kloar then turned towards Rel'larutina, as the camera pointed towards her. Her eye lit up a bit, as she smiled, taken completely by surprise.

  • Fre'kloar - DIS CHIK was responsible fer savin da Rogue Boyz by puttin togetha dis sik an cunnin plan dat stopped us frum bein taken down a dark path. i kno dat we tend ta fink da chikz hate da loronz, but she is da one dat saved da loronz frum becomin evil. an so fer dat reeson i am announcin two changes, an da first one is dat da loronz is gonna respekt da chikz moar frum now on. WES GONNA GIV DEM A BIGGA ROLE IN SOCIETY AN STOP DA OPPRESSHON. becuz if dey can help us uphold loron tradishons den we is gonna help dem uphold deirs.
  • Jol'kiar - BAK IN MA DAYZ IT WASNT LIKE DIS but den agen i suppos we culdnt hav gotten dis far without her help
  • Grak'tona - DA CHIK WAS A GOOD BODYGUARD AN HELPED UPHOLD DA THRONE. I GIV DIS MA ROYAL STAMP OF APPROOVAL
  • Hagto'Zhl - eh. shes ok
  • Rel'larutina - Thank you! I... Well, I can't say I'm used to receiving any recognition, but I'm glad I did.
  • Ray'loth - ma gf is still betta
  • Traz'raka - mate ya gf is-
  • Knar'gank - leev it man. let him be hapi
  • Kal'kuir - my wife is betta
  • Rogue Geek - Actually, Rel'larutina had most of the ideas. I was content to just let the Rogue Boyz fail and be lost to oblivion. I would resign and become a cleaning lady robot on Hyperborea. But this works too, I guess.
  • Hagto'Zhl - wow

With all that said, Fre'kloar resumed his speech.

  • Fre'kloar - DA SECOND FING IS DAT DA LORONZ NEED STOOF TA DO. now i still refuse ta fite da Borealis Galaxy becuz i kno dat if we break da treety den deyz gonna turn all gunfire on da loronz. BUT NONEDALESS WE WULDNT BE LORONZ IF WE DIDNT HAV STOOF TA FITE. so even tho wes not allowed ta fite in DIS oonivers, deres otha ooniverses out dere. frum now on, DA LORONZ IS BECOMIN INTADIMENSHONAL WARRIAS DAT FITE BATTLES IN OTHA OONIVERSES. AN WES GONNA BE SIK AT IT.
  • Fre'kloar - i kno i lost a lotta good will wiv da loronz ova da past howeva many yeers, but i promis yoo if yoo rejoin da Rogue Boyz den yoo will be welcomed bak into a bright new futur fer da loronz. A FUTURE DAT NEVA FORGETS WHO WE WAS. WHOS WIV ME????

While at first met with skeptical silence, eventually a few Loron begun to cheer, leading others to open up as well. Soon enough, most of the Loron in the island were cheering too, pumped by the speech. Jol'kiar walked over to Fre'kloar and held on his shoulder, smiling proudly.

  • Jol'kiar - ya did well man
  • Fre'kloar - yeh da boyz is gonna com bak to da fold an WES STARTIN A NOO CHAPTA IN LORON HISTORY. SOMONE WRITE DA GANGSTAPEDIA ENTRY
  • Brag'klogga - ON IT AHAHAHAHAHA
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - EVRYUN CAN HAV A CHEET DAY
  • Hagto'Zhl - idunno bout yoo lot but all dis fitin and winnin made me hungry. WHOS UP FOR PIZZA????
  • Zalk'don - YO IVE GOT AN IDEA. SALVAGE DEFGLASHAS BASE AN TURN IT INTO A GIANT OVEN
  • Fre'kloar - HUR YEH. FOR NAO ON DIS WORLD IS NAO "DA PIZZA PLANET WHER WE WON"
  • Rogue Geek - You mean, "Da Pizza Planet Where We Won IV", right?
  • Fre'kloar - oh uhhhh yeh sur i meant ta say dat

The New Chapter[]

Having returned to the Propa Big Rogue Krooza in higher spirits than ever, each of the Leedas, Poshiez, and Warbosses gathered on the command bridge with hundreds of boxes of pizza to eat, and loud music playing in the background. For once, Rel'larutina was participating in the party, rather than being forced to deliver the pizza. She smiled and joked around with the rest of them, which was a new experience for her.

  • Rel'larutina - Y'know, I used to look down on these parties, but they're actually pretty fun now I'm in them.
  • Jol'kiar - its gonna take som gettin used to havin chikz in da party but eh. culd be worse
  • Grak'tona - DA KING HAS DECREED IT SO AN DAT MEENS WES DOIN IT. YO EVRYON REMEMBA MA SIK SPEECH YESTADAY WEN I SED WES GONNA BECOM INTADIMENSHONAL WARRIAS?
  • Voa'reak - dat was frekloar tho
  • Grak'tona - ...yeh... BUT I WROT DA SPEECH
  • Traz'raka - man sit ya ass down and be humble for at leest a day. frekloar came up wiv dat and its gonna be sik
  • Grak'tona - ................. ok yanno kno wat yeh sur DA KING DECREES ITS FREKLOARS CELEBRASHON
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - well dats betta dan noffin. anyway hao is we even gonna do dis interdimenshon stoof?
  • Kal'kuir - im startin work on a gate rite now dat works simila to a cold relay. so all we gotta do is go throo it den fite warlords an wateva an com bak heer

The Rogue Geek arrived, carrying with her another several boxes of pizza and placing them at the table.

  • Rogue Geek - Indeed, though before we even think of turning it on, there's the matter of how the rest of Borealis will react. The Polar Crystal Alliance is unlikely to just accept us traveling across dimensions, probably because they assume we'll cause an apocalypse in doing so. Which honestly, I can totally believe in.
  • Fre'kloar - DEY DONT NEED TA KNO LOL
  • Rogue Geek - We can try and keep it hidden, but the knowledge will probably leak at some point. Still, so long as we can convince them we are not gonna cause another rift in space-time, they should leave us alone.
  • Fre'kloar - got it. YO KALKUIR WRITE A THESIS ON HOW DA LORONZ WONT CAUSE A RIFT IN SPACETIME
  • Kal'kuir - OOH SOUNDS FUN. IMMA ADD ALL MA THEORIES
  • Fre'kloar - AN WHIL YOR AT IT: YOR A FLIPPIN NERD. WAT KINDA NERD WRITES BOOKS
  • Kal'kuir - DA ONE MAKIN DA INTERDIMENSHONAL PORTAL DUMBO
  • Fre'kloar - GET TA WORK AFTA DA PARTY DEN
  • Gol'thabex - also write dat if anyfin comes crawlin off da portal da pca can always hire da thugz fer dosh ta solve it hurhurhur
  • Traz'raka - NO NO. SAY DA MAFIA WILL SOLVE IT
  • Gol'thabex - OI. DONT STEEL MA CLIENTS
  • Jol'kiar - BAK IN MY DAYZ WE DIDNT DO STOOF FER DOSH
  • Gol'thabex - yeh well nao is da day of da bling old tima
  • Hagto'Zhl - YO WE SHULD TRAVEL ACROSS DA MULTIVERS AN FIND A VERSHON OF UNO WE CAN SHANK
  • Fre'kloar - nah its ok i hav a plan. WES GONNA GO ACROSS DA MULTIVERS AN FIND DA SIX INFINITY STONES. DEN WE USE DEM TA KILL THANOS
  • Brag'klogga - DEY CALLED ME A MADMAN
  • Fre'kloar - NAH DEY CALLED DAT XEG GEEZA A MADMAN
  • Rogue Geek - Well, they are both madmen. It's just our madman is not out for our blood.
  • Brag'klogga - TIME TA PREECH DA WORD OF DA GODZ ACROSS ALL DA MULTIVERS. DIS DAYZ COMIN!!!!!!!!
  • Kal'kuir - IMMA LOOK FER DA SIKKEST FIREWORKS IN DA MULTIVERS
  • Zalk'don - I WANT A PART IN DAT. I WANNA FIRE DA BOMZ
  • Voa'reak - IT WILL BE MY GOAL TA FLY IN EVRY PLANET IN DA MULTIVERS
  • Drizz'pyrokirk - IMMA SHOW ALL DEM STOOPID INTERDIMENSHONAL ALIENS MA PROTEIN SHAKE. DEYZ GONNA BE JELOUS
  • Naktor'zak - HOPE DEY LIKE MA SPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED
  • Knar'gank - dont reely care tbh just so long as i get ta sneek
  • Hagto'Zhl - tbh im down wiv brags idea most of all. LETS SPRED DA RELIJON ACROSS DA MULTIVERS AN START A CHURCH. WE CAN WRITE ANOTHA HOLY BOOK CALLED DA BOOK OF GANGSTA
  • Ray'loth - yor biased tho cus zr'an and k'ar is ya dads
  • Fre'kloar - DA NOO CHAPTA OF DA LORONZ BEGINS as soon as da portal is redi WHICH IS SOON

They all cheered and continued eating. Soon enough, they would start new adventures elsewhere.

No universe is safe.

Da Loron stoof
WEZ DA REAL LORONZ MAN DONT REED DAT UNO STOOF ITS DUM
OI BOLD MEENS SPESHUL STOOF
WE IS DA REAL COOL LORONZ DA ROGUE BOYZ IS DUM DONT REED DEM
WE IZ DA DEFFMARCH BOYZ AN WE IS DA BEST COS WE WIV DA MALI'NAR YA DUMBOS
Part SporeWiki:Fiction Universe
Advertisement