Fiction talk:Vyro'Narza/Archive 2

Incoming Transmission from the Asgord Empire - Frequency 140.85
Hello, do you read me? Ok. I am diplomat Lezia from the Asgord Empire. We are a Kind and friendly Empire from the Kraw Galaxy. You might not know where that is, but It's far from ottzello. We like your species, you all look cuddly and cute, and we would like to be friends with you. We can help with diplomacy, if you need anything. Would you care for an alliance? And by the way, why do they call you "Taldar", as you are the Vyroni-Nazryds? We don't understand why... =P. By the way, if we become allies, can you contact the Kraw and the Tahars? They need good friends too. =D So, bye, hope you got my message!

- Diplomat Lezia of the Asgord Empire

Irskaad - Talk to me - Respect the Kraw and their Galaxy! - 11:12, August 28, 2010 (UTC)

Incoming Transmission from the Xylon Empire
We, the Xylon Empire, are very interested in your Gyronic energy. We have much interest in science, so I would like to see how much Gyronic energy a single Xylon could control. With this info, our science would increase much further. Thank you in advance.

The Council of the Xylon Empire

Incoming Transmission from the Kingish (an unknown age ago)
''We accept the alliance with pleasure. Your kind fascinates us.'' OluapPlayer 14:03, December 21, 2010 (UTC)

Incoming Transmission - DCP Channel
-Kcch- ''That is certainly a timeline we must try to navigate to. It is also the same one, where strange Transapients from the future captured Kilnok, there must be things very important that will happen yet. Yes, we gladly accept this offer, our time travel has only been very primitive, such as using time dilation or wormholes. Thank you very much. Especially now the Xhodocto have evolved to a new height.'' -Kcch- --Dr.Kenders 22:55, December 22, 2010 (UTC)

Incoming Transmission of Rambo Nation
Hail Vyro Narza

''Your message could not more times. A disaster has struck us. Our Senate was attacked and now the Colonie of Javan has fallen by a betrayal of the Vartekians. If our troubles were not enough with the return of the Xhodocto and the rising of the Confederacy. None the less we are happy that you contacted us and we would appreciate the technologically aid. The talk of the Dark Gyronic reactors are very interessting and perhaps you can help us integrate them into our Wells Class, by far the most powerful in our fleet? And the drones are also welcome. And yes, we accept your offer but can we do also something in return for you?''

Empress Ramashe of Rambo Nation out.

Hey Techno, great that the Taldar are contacting Rambo Nation and the aid would be awesome. I was wondering, perhaps the technology can be used in the Wells class vessels (one is in service, the other in production) as they are the Nation's most exclusive and powerfullst ship in the navy. Making the Nation not too strong at once. Let me know what you think, and perhaps the two can work together more in the future? Also do you have creations of these drones? Greetz, Dinoman82 22:24, December 23, 2010 (UTC)

Hail Vyro Narza,

''We are honored by your aid and the Dark Gyronic reactors. This will surely improve our Wells Class and perhaps even more classes. Again thank you very much and I hope we could once meet in person, as I have never met a Taldar before in person, just by transmission. Again thank you and we hope our galactic relations will continue until the end of days. ''

Empress Ramshe of Rambo Nation out.

BTW the Drones look very great :D Dinoman82 13:07, December 27, 2010 (UTC)

Requesting assistence
''Thanks, and wow, books, usually some of the first technologies to be invented yet they barely change through time. Now, I'm sure you know what I'm going to say already, or maybe not, I don't know enough about what it means to be a Taldar. Now, we need your help in defeating the Quantumhorde. This was our original plan, but unfortunately, we required the Shka'Tun Directed Freezer devices. Unfortunately, they were godtech, from Verazaph himself, and they could not help us as they are no longer in their possession.''

''We have modified the idea. We still send Drove Hunters, to lure the Quantumhorde into special locations. We need you, once in place, to create a defect in spacetime, a bowel in space if you will, similar to a magnetic trap. This vortex bowel, will operate much like the normal mechanism for creating Bosonic Condensates, involving evaporate cooling the central picture, due to the quantum effects, they will become one big super-"blob". They have consumed so much mass, they will collapse into black holes inside, taking all the Quantumhorde with it. Please give us aid, by creating the defect in spacetime. I'm sure you will know where and how to create one, once we have navigated down the right timeline. There will be war-songs going through the ages about this if you do, if not, the universe will possibly perish.'' --DCP Taldarologist



Okay, I'll write it soon. 01:45, December 24, 2010 (UTC)


 * Thank you for your assistence. We are very lucky to know you, most Tier 0 civs would ignore us. --DCP 21:17, December 24, 2010 (UTC)

Incoming Transmission From...
''Hail, mighty creatures from beyond. I am a humble ambassador from a distant world, but who I am is not of your concern. My superiors are particularly interested in your empire's abilities of controlling time... maybe we can create a friendly relation and share our technologies with each other... Heheheh...''


 * If you truly know who I am, then you know who I serve. Aren't you woried about what we can do with such power?


 * So be it. I will accept your device. But try to stop us, and death shall fall upon you. See you in your dreams...

---Transmission lost---

Incoming transmission from the UVF
"Greetings and salutations, benders of time. We, a lowly nation, would be honored to accept a diplomatic union with your glorious species! We are also interested in radiant beings such as yourself, and we believe our relations will prosper. Farewell!"

--Emperor Aturox - Falco Punch -- '' AHHHHH! '' 21:36, January 20, 2011 (UTC)

Incoming Transimission From the Xylon Empire
Greetings, we have recieved word that we can channel the energy well. We would love to learn techniques from the masters of the energy. Please, would you help us channel?

ShredderDX never know till you try! 20:36, February 7, 2011 (UTC) (Sorry about it being so late, I've been busy)

Taldar review
So here is my review, it contains feedback, positive and negative views, as well as some ideas to break your writers block! :)

Navigation
The navigation template is awesomely layed out and easy to access. My only issue though is that there are many subpags, often quite small, which I think is uneeded, unless they go into extreme detail. However, if all the starships and troopers were merged into one page for example, it might make it easier for new users to understand the actual purpose of the article, underlying its fundamental points. I can see the point why Jo has done this though, not all browsers are powerful enough to load info quickly, and because Jo is dyslexic it might be easier for her to manage the pages, so can see the advantages and disadvantages.

Layout
The articles themselves I have no problem with, they are well crafted, I can see Jo takes her time and effort to create good quality pages, something that makes a good fiction. It is easy to read, and I can see very good coding skills.

Grammar and spelling is perfect, a good achievement for dyslexic people, although your are probably using autocorrect, this is something everyone should probably do to kill annoying typo's that occasionally pop up.

Spore
The original Taldar creation was not the best creature I've seen, but I can see that Xho has made a good creation that Jo has chosen, and I think it is a good choice. Of course if the Taldar are 5D, it can only be their three dimensional form (a cross-section), but what a clever concept!

They are certainly very unique, they have powers one would expecrt in the fith dimension, they have gravitational eyes to see this dimension and can change their sentience quotient (although these are details I have added myself, but Jo has accepted).

As for images, the fiction definately needs some more, but imagination can play a big role, so not too many. These images do not have to be made by Jo, but can be made by other users as well.

Claims
The Taldar in the beginning were claimed to be as strong as the Xhodocto, this of course annoyed many users. However, me and Jo have worked together in explaining the technical details. Being five dimensional has more of a view over spacetime than being in three dimensions. In the 5th dimension, the Taldar can navigate the timelines of time, and use holographic physics and quantum principles to alter them.

I think Jo still needs to consider the nature of time. Its not so simple to simply change history, and I must admit I'm a bit uncomfortable with the idea of time being gyronic.

Information
The information is quite rich, but again, some things don't seem to be consistent with each other. The article on time states two different explanations, one is a physics approach and one is that it is made of gyronic, however, this is uncommon in the fiction as a whole. I think there needs to be more information exactly on how the Taldar change time altogether.

Concept
The concept is pretty amazing when one dabbles with time, as well as being very unique, few dare to delve into timelike fictions. There has been some great science fiction stories involving time and the Taldar. They hold a great place as important to the fiction universe's history, and expand upon the War of Ages saga.

There does seem to be somethings which seem to be a little offtopic, particulry in society and culture. The Taldar are very humancentric, they have jobs and comparable sports, trooper classes, rifles, Eathly concepts of art, music and computer games. I think a five dimensional race is going to be very alien with nothing remotely human. It would be interesting to see what it would be like in the eyes of a far more alien culture.

Until very recently there was a bit of a problem. Why would five dimensional beings be so interested in three dimensional ones? Nearly every other Tier 0 civilization (and very high Tier 1's do not interact much with far less advanced species). But me and Jo think we have solved it, by the fact that every self-aware being can have a slight affect on time, and ones important to major events or have learned how to have more grasp of time could cause problems which the Taldar either guide or stop. This really makes quite Tier 0 and mysterious. I think this is a problem no longer.

Future
What do I think is the future of the Taldar? There is some crazy stuff happening between the Omnipotent Four and other godraces at the moment, things beyond the scope of the sapients. Indeed the Taldar will have an important place in the next War of Ages, and will have more to be said about the history of the fiction universe.

Great hard sci-fi stories can be written as well, like my ones with the BCC. As well as characters who's destinies are altered by the Taldar, because the Taldar guide them like guardian angels or spirit guides.

There is of course the Traffphyds, perhaps have more interaction between them both!

Verdict
Overall, its become a great fiction! What is perhaps most outstanding of all is that the Taldar in the beginning faced a lot of controversey. However, Jo has demonstrated the ability over the course of time to vastly improve the Taldar. No longer they are n00blishly powerful, now they are a respected fiction that earns itself as the respresentitives of time, this is something few can achieve in. I would like to see more explanations of how they manipulate time, and perhaps less humancentric culture, swapping cricket for something "truly alien", it makes it more interesting and gives a better appeal for the fiction. So while the fiction is very cool and enjoyable to read, I think it still needs some work, but it is not too hard to change.

-- Wormulon  Talk to me  14:28, April 10, 2011 (UTC)
 * Navigation: 8/10
 * Layout: 10/10
 * Spore: 6/10 (counting original creature and lack of pictures)
 * New Taldar, vehicles and buildings: 9/10 (Even reaching MPN, yes these are cool)
 * Information: 7/10
 * Concept: 10/10
 * Final verdict: 8/10
 * You're the best :)-- 15:25, April 10, 2011 (UTC)

Shard of spacetime appears
 ''Dear Taldar, we do indeed share similar dimensions, we specialize in keeping the String Manifolds in harmony and computing the matter/energy quanta to run universal programming applications, while you maintain the strength of gravity and course of time. We think that by putting our abilities together we can sweep out those ugly quantum fluctuations that can create time anomalies and in your benefit make realspace smooth and makind up and downloadinf information for us easier from universes. --BCC Timelessness

Incoming transmission from the Junction
"We are the Junction. We have heard of a species capable of controlling time itself, and being able of knowing all possible futures. We want to know, how is that possible? What kind of technology is used in this? Certainly it would be something unknown to us, and we can't allow things to be unknown to us. And how can we be sure that you are not faking these stories? We expect an answer soon."

- The Junction

OluapPlayer -  Fear me, cowards!  17:51, April 18, 2011 (UTC)
 * "Never, and I repeat, never understimate our potential. Transmission closed."

- The Junction


 * MiniShuulathoi.png OluapPlayer  -  Fear me, cowards!  15:35, April 22, 2011 (UTC)